A
female
age
30-35,
*rokenlove
writes:Okay basically my boyfriend of five months split up with me because we were going through a rough patch and he didnt see the point in us continuing anymore as it was so complicated. I was absolutely devastated as I loved and still love him with my entire self. On the Friday night I got wasted and started crying to this random woman I'd just met about him ending it with me and she said to get over him you need to get under someone else. I dont know why the hell I thought it was good advice but I did. I ended up going home with this guy... I regret it more than anything in my entire life. I hate!! myself for what I've done. I'd do anything to take it back! My Ex found out and went mental. He was in so much pain... his eyes... God, I wanted to rip my heart out. He hated me. A few days after it happened, we went for a walk together and I explained myself as best as I could and he told me how he was feeling. The day after he came round and was hugging me and cuddling me. He told me about how he'd forgiven me, he didnt want me to hate myself anymore and that he still loved me and he wants us to be friends. For the following days, he kept coming round and cuddling me and hugging me. We've even kissed and told each other we love each other and everything! I asked him if we were going to get back together and he said No, he could never trust me again after what I did. But he's still coming round to see me and we're still hugging and kissing! He even came round this morning and we held each other for ages... we even got a bit sexual but he didnt want to actually have sex... we just did other things. So after all this... and he still doesnt want to get back with me. He says he's never felt about anyone else this way and that I mean the world to him. I love him, I need him back, I feel empty without him. Please can someone tell me what to do?! I need to know how to get a guys trust back? How can I get him back!? There is no way in hell I would ever do anything like that again. I've stopped drinking, smoking .. I don't really go out that much anymore either as I just constantly think about him. Please help.Thank you...x
View related questions:
get back together, kissing, my ex, split up Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 May 2009): If you really want things to work,what you must do is extremely difficult. Stop being lovely dovey with him. Stop kissing him and doing other things with him. If he ask you, why? Let him know that you love him very much and want to be with him for the rest of your life, put your heart out there.You want him to long for you like you do for him, so give him an opportunity to miss you and miss being with you(give him space). By doing this, if he really loves you he'll realize how much you mean to him and come back to you(or even call) If he calls it is a good sign, it means he is willing(ask him to be certain). If he doesn't you must by ready to understand that things are not meant to be and everything happens for a reason. If it doesn't work out don't go back to your old ways, move forward(remember God put someone on this earth especially for you, it's just a matter of time!)
A
female
reader, AskEve +, writes (5 October 2008):
 You need to earn his trust back again by remaining faithful to him while you have him as a friend. Actions speak louder than words. In the meantime BE his friend, tell him it's not a good idea that you get too close physically as he's already told you he won't go back with you again and that you want to keep your emotions in tact. This will also make him want you more... At the end of the day, you and him had broken up when you went with this other guy. You were also intoxicated and have admitted that it was stupid of you doing what you did but we all make mistakes.
If he really does love and you if you can keep him at arms length for a while (ie no hugs, kisses or intimacy) then I'm sure he'll give it another go with you. Learn from your mistakes in the future though.
~Eve~
...............................
A
female
reader, missindependant +, writes (1 October 2008):
 Hi,
My opinion is that you don't want to push the guy's feelings to far at this moment in time as he has done the biggest thing that I don't think any other guy would do, and that is he forgave you. I think that you should leave it for the time been and I know you miss him. But at least your still friends out of it. If it was ment to be - in time the guy will realise that you are truly sorry for your mistake and if he loves you that much he will in the future agree to get back with you. Yes this may take a fair bit of time and you may have to sacrifice that time for him. If he means that much you will wait. But at the same time I don't want to give you false hope either. If you think it is taking to long and he doesn't seem intrested in that way decide to stand up tall for yourself and begin fresh and maybe you will find someone new. If he acts jealous then there's your answer
There is till something there ...
...............................
|
