A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: Hello everyone,So I've been talking to this girl I met for about three months now and I've come to the conclusion things aren't going to really work out between us, there's a lot of reasons but mainly we're just at different points in our life. The problem is she has a history of self-harm/depression and she really likes me. I'm sure you can understand the problem. So what am I supposed to do? How do I make it as painless as possible, regardless of what I say she's going to be upset but I don't want to push her over the edge... and before anyone decides to blame me, save your breath. I didn't see this coming and I feel bad enough... any help would be appreciated. Thanks Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (7 September 2014):
You can't control how she reacts, but you can make the break up less emotional, if you know her well enough.
I say, the sooner you break up the better, don't drag it out.
And be honest, tell her that you feel bad, but that you just don't feel a spark between you two and you think ending it is what's right for you.
This isn't YOUR fault (or hers) you two are just not very compatible and maybe... she shouldn't even be dating if she is emotionally unstable, she should FOCUS on herself, but.. that is not for you to tell her. (doesn't mean you can't think it).
If you don't want to date her, then you don't want to date her. I see no reason to "blame" you for that. We have all been there.
You can give her a call and ask to meet up so you can talk, she will know that something is up. Let her pick a place maybe, and then don't drag it out. Or you can end it over the phone if you think that would be easier. Just don't sink to ending it over FB or text, have some respect and do it in person or over the phone.
My suggestion is to BLOCK her number, cut the contact 100% after it's done. Keeping in contact wouldn't help either of you.
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