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How do I dump my online match?

Tagged as: Dating, Online dating<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (29 January 2016) 3 Answers - (Newest, 29 January 2016)
A female United States age 36-40, anonymous writes:

I matched with a guy on Tinder and we started talking. He was really nice and our personalities clicked. But when we met in person there was no sexual attraction. Also, the fact that he's 31 and has never had a relationship longer than 1 month kinda turned me off.

I don't think I want to see him again, but he's been texting me a lot. And he also asked me out on a second date. Should I Just stop answering his messages, or do I just tell him I'm not into him?

I'm thinking I don't owe him anything because we just met and it was only 1 date. And I don't want to be presumptuous and tell him I don't want to date him, when we haven't even discussed what he's looking for.

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A female reader, ellsie96 United Kingdom +, writes (29 January 2016):

ellsie96 agony auntIt's fine for you to not be into this guy, but I think you have to tell him!

Like Honeypie said, it's kind of in bad taste to just sort of ignore someone until they leave you alone (I've actually had this happen to me once and it was so embarrassing to keep texting them and either getting really short replies or no reply at all until I realised the situation)

So just message him and tell him that you're not interested, but thanks for the offer of the second date but that is where it has to end.

Of course, you don't have to message him if you REALLY don't want to, but that will leave things on a bad note, and on a more practical note he may keep messaging you for a number of days before he realises what you are doing.

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A male reader, TrancedRhythmEar Saudi Arabia +, writes (29 January 2016):

TrancedRhythmEar agony auntNone of this passive bull$hit. Tell him you dont want a second date. Who cares about his feelings hes a man he can move on.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States +, writes (29 January 2016):

Honeypie agony auntI'm not a fan of "ghosting" (basically - ignoring the other party till they figure out you are not interested) I find it in bad taste and manner.

So I'd text him back and tell him, thanks for the offer of a second date, but he is not what you are looking for, wish him good luck, and THEN block/delete his number (not all guys handle a rejection well and might be verbally aggressive in turn and there REALLY is no need to keep his number).

IT IS OK! to not like the person or want the person you go on a date with - it HAPPENS! Sometimes dating profiles can sound great, but in person it just doesn't work.

And might I add... If you are looking for a guy to DATE - Tindr might not be the best option. It's pretty much a hook up app. for casual sex. So it doesn't surprise me this guy hasn't been with anyone longer than a month. He's probably too busy hooking up.

Good luck.

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