A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hey,Now have been with the most amazing man for about 3 and a half years now and I couldn't been more happier. To us there is no issue whatsoever as we are still in love even though we're way past the honeymoon stage lol. I have plenty of friends around his age and my own age as well as friends from different races so its never been a issue to us both. Recently I have received a lot of negative comments from some "friends" who have said horrible things about both our race and age. We've both been called every name under the sun with one "friend" even calling him a sugar daddy point blank to my face and another "friend" agreeing to the comment.Luckily I also have wonderful friends who have shown nothing but love and encouragement, inviting him out on nights out, he even joined us for st paddy's day. My question is how do I deal with all the negativity from all those horrible so called "friends"? I know some might say ignore them but those words cut deep and hurt Hope to hear from you soonxxx Reply to this Question
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female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (15 June 2017):
 You stop being friends with them, simple as that. They are not friends if they are being cruel and hurtful.
A
female
reader, Ivyblue  +, writes (4 June 2017):
 I don't think you should ignore the comments at all. It's not what you say but how you say it. If they are your true friends, you standing up for your relationship firstly, not something you should feel the need to do in the first place and secondly a quite word to knock it off understood and respected. When it happens, nip it in the bud right then and there. Let them know that the comments are hurtful and not warranted. If they react negatively quip " Yes, thats just how I feel "
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A
female
reader, Youcannotbeserious +, writes (4 June 2017):
 You call these people "friends". True friends don't make hurtful remarks to you or about you. They support you in the choices you make, especially if they see you are happy.
If your boyfriend treats you well and makes you happy, they have no right to make comments about your relationship which hurt you or him.
Having said that, calling someone a sugar daddy isn't such a big deal, surely? Could there be an element of jealousy involved here? Could you handle these comments with humour? Could you shrug them off and laugh and say something like "age is just a number and it's the person that counts"?
You can't control what people say, even "friends", but you can control how you react to the comments. Are they said in a nasty way or just as a joke? (I know, not a very funny joke, but sense of humour is a very individual thing.) If you feel these people are being nasty, perhaps you need to limit your contact with them, or tell them, in no uncertain terms, that, as your friends, they should show more respect for your feelings. If the comments are their idea gentle ribbing, perhaps the best idea would be to grow a slightly thicker skin and learn to laugh them off because YOU are happy.
Good luck to the pair of you. I hope things work out for you.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (4 June 2017):
 You DROP the people who give you crap.
Now I can understand if YOU over those 3 1/2 year have come to them ALOT and complained, THEN I'd say maybe they have a reason to give you crap - but if you HAVEN'T I say cut them loose.
Who needs Negative Nancy and Nate around?
If they have a problem with the age and race of your BF, then really... THAT is their problem and I'd let them deal with that issue THEMSELVES.
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