A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:How do I deal with being raped by my father constantly at 13-15? Ive been in counseling but it doesnt work for me I keep having images and flashbacks no matter what. And it doesnt help that ive been molested by my brother and cousins earlier on in life. Its very depressing and im afraid it might affect my relationship. I know how the saying goes "you cant love someone else unless you love yourself" I dont love myself I hate myself but I just want to stop going back to what happened to me over and over and over. Who wants to live like this, sometimes it makes me feel like theres no hope in life so why am I living?
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male
reader, anoms  +, writes (22 February 2009):
 i know how it feels but not to the extent you have been taken advantage of, your story is very unsettling and i know it becomes very easy to hate yourself, even though i was probably much younger then you at the time. but im much older then you now and im still having problems dealing with it and moving on. but if i could go back 5+years i would try harder to trust others. dont let this be the end of everything, your very young so please dont get into any risky relashionships. make sure you find somone you can confide your issues in that will never hert you no matter if or how the relashionship ends, gudluk.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (22 February 2009): It might help your recovery process if you were to report this abuse and see the perpetrators put in jail, which is where they belong - particularly your father.
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A
female
reader, Mrs. Mom +, writes (22 February 2009):
 First, you have to be in a safe place where you won't be raped anymore. Do you have that? If not, call child protective services in your county and have them arrange for you to live someplace else.
Next, if you are physically safe, I recommend you try a different counselor. It's possible the one you've worked with isn't a good fit for you. There is no doubt that being repeatedly raped and sexually abused by relatives is going to leave a huge mark on your emotions and self-image, and most people need a lot of help to deal with that. It will affect your future relationships.
If you are working with a social worker, or any responsible adult who knows about your abuse, ask them to connect you with a group of rape survivors. There are groups in every city, and it can be very healing to talk with others who have been through the same as you.
It's good you're asking these questions. It shows you have the will to survive and thrive. It may be hard work, but you can do it.
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