A
female
age
36-40,
*o,Xo
writes:Dear cupid, My boyfriend and I have been dating for almost a year now and I'm starting to get bored with our relationship! He NEVER leaves the house not even to go to our friends which live across the street. He thinks that you need money to do everything... which is not true.. only time we have fun or do anything is if we have money which isn't very often.. :( I love him to death and don't want to end our relationship. He's got boring in the bed.. we never do it anymore. I've tried everything I can think of to bring excitement back to our relationship but everything I try hasn't worked.. Please help me!!
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (21 December 2009): Go OUT and do things that do not expose you to spending that much money.
There are TONS of things to do for free everyday anywhere. Use YOUR imagination and TELL your partner to join you exploring them.
Perhaps, your relationship needs leadership. Since you are the one who finds the status quo full of ennui take charge and tell your recruit to ship out with you when the mood strikes you.
A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim  +, writes (21 December 2009):
 leave again, and when he comes begging for you to take him back ask him what for, ask him what he thinks he adds to your life, and just keep walking
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A
female
reader, Xo,Xo +, writes (21 December 2009):
Xo,Xo is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI've Tried that! I go out with out him all the time!! I go away for days at a time with out him. I've tired that when we have money to do something i want that doesn't cost money N still that doesn't work! Tarnished Knight ~ I go out without him all the time! he never goes with me anywhere! I'm out n about everyday! I;m not the boring one.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 December 2009): Next time he gets money to do things, you tell him YOU want to decide what you guys should do. And then you go do something that you don't need money for at all. Just to show him.
Could it be he is depressed since he just sits indoors all the time?
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A
male
reader, Tarnished Knight  +, writes (20 December 2009):
I love this question....why...because you are part of the challenge and the answer. If you are bored, than you are boring too. If not, you would do something without him. So, you are also boring. Ok, wait, before you get mad at me, let me explain. He wants to do nothing and you want to do something....so do it. Tell him, I am going to the neighbors, I know you dont like to come, but if you change your mind you will know where to find me. I am going for a walk, do you want to come, no, ok, I'll see you when I get back. Go shopping, go to a movie, do anything and you will see what happens. If you keep doing what you are doing, you will keep getting what you are getting..(which by the way is what is happening). By him saying he is not doing anything, he has controlled your actions too. Change it and you will love the results, trust me. Good luck
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A
female
reader, Xo,Xo +, writes (20 December 2009):
Xo,Xo is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI've tried that i go out with all the time well he stays at home
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 December 2009): Hello. The excuse about not doing things because you need money....is just that. An excuse. Youre his comfy armchair. Dont waste time fretting because he wants you but wont do anything. Go out and enjoy life. With or without him. He sounds very slack. As for nothing happening in the bedroom. He must be very sure of himself. It doesnt sound as if he does much at all! Dont waste time waiting for him to get up and do things. Go do them without him x
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 December 2009): You are the one making all the effort here, and while he is there like a couch potato life is passing you by. I've come across a lot of women who complain that the man is boring and won't go out, but usually they are a lot older than you! Could be he is depressed or something, so maybe you should have a chat. But in the meantime, go out and have fun with your friends and leave him at home. That might jolt him out of it and if it doesn't at least you won't be wasting your life.
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A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim +, writes (20 December 2009):
Wow, and your ID lists your age as young still, so pick up your feet and walk on out the door, do those things that don't cost money, get out there and start living your life, and while you are at it you might meet somebody is prepared to live a little right along side of you!
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (20 December 2009):
He can want you as much as he likes. If he's not prepared to put effort in, or listen to you, you need to move on and find a guy who will. I know that sounds harsh, but you've given him another chance and he hasn't changed. That means he won't change. Don't up with second best.
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A
female
reader, Xo,Xo +, writes (20 December 2009):
Xo,Xo is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI've tried to tell him I am worried N i tried to end the relationship but he begged for me back! Soo what do I do now... I know he wants me!...
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (20 December 2009):
You have to choices. You can either tell that you're worried the relationship is in trouble and that it needs input (don't use the word boring, he might get very upset), or you can end it and move on.
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