A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:So I've been with my boyfriend for over 8 months, everything's great and I love him very much.The problem is, when we started out, he'd call and text me all the time, take me out, buy me little gifts just because, but recently that's all stopped and he's got too comfortable and that's mainly my fault.We've been through a lot, and he's broken up with me a few times, then realized he's missed me and made a mistake, and each time I've taken him back and we've worked it out. And because of this, I think he thinks that I'm the good little girlfriend and I'm not going anywhere so he doesn't have to make the effort anymore.He knows I love him to bits and that I can't leave him and that there's no one else I want to be with, but because he knows this it's affecting how he is with me.What I want is for him to make the effort like he used to, and I've sat him down an explained to him that I want him to put more effort in and that I feel like he's taking me for granted, and he's promised he'll change but he never does.So now I know it's down to me, and I have to stop him knowing that I'm always here for him no matter what - I need to sort of pull the rug from under his feet by suddenly changing my demeanor to stop him taking me for granted.What I want to know is, how do I go about doing that?Do I stop texting him and instigating contact or do I ignore him for a bit or what?Please help x
View related questions:
text Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (23 November 2009):
Well look, you can't just sit and say "treat me better or I'm walking" because that's a lie.
Yes you are with your first love and you can't see yourself being with anyone else right now but you have to see that when you are an adult THE most important skill you can have is this:
LOVE IS NEVER WORTH STAYING FOR IF YOU ARE UNHAPPY
Your happiness ALWAYS has to come above your love. Otherwise you are just setting yourself up for a pathetic miserable life of being treated like crap.
He knows full well that he can do whatever he wants, make it your fault, and you'll lie down and let him wipe his feet on you.
You need to learn some self respect, and then when YOU know you'll walk away from this boy who BLATANTLY doesn't care about your feelings, then you can show him. But here's the thing.... when you walk away. DO NOT go back.
You are worth better treatment than this.
Good Luck!! xx
|
