A
female
age
26-29,
*hana4567
writes: My parents knew that i was going out with this guy and they requested me to break up with him..The problem is,i don't know how to break up with him without upsetting him..If i don't break up with him,it will be forever in my conscience,and i would be in danger if my parents knew that i haven't broke up with him yet...How do i break up with him?:(
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (14 December 2010): Firstly, you have no choice but to follow your parents wishes at the moment. It doesn't have to be a full stop though sweetheart. Tell your boyfriend that you have to put the relationship on hold whilst you talk things through with your parents as, naturally, they really care about you and your life as well as the fact that you love them and don't want to have to lie to them. If the guy respects you he, even though he may not be happy with this, will go along with it. Reassure him that you still like him and do not want to hurt him. Explain that unless you take a break for the moment then there is no chance at all for this relationship.
Your next step should be to sit down with your parents and tell them what you've done. Hopefully this will give them the confidence that you do actually listen to them and that, in turn should provide the building blocks for you to state your case. Ask them why they wanted this to end and make it clear to them that you like the guy and really do want to be close friends with him at the very least. It's a difficult situation all round but you are already on the way to demonstrating that you are mature enough to cope with a relationship provided you've done all of the above.
Life is all about compromise and this isn't going to be the first time you find yourself caught between a rock and a hard place. In this instance, you just need to keep your cool and explain your feelings to your parents. They obviously love you just as much as you love them and don't want to see you miserable and unhappy if they can help it.
Keep things calm, don't go pleading and try to control your emotions. With luck, the three of you will reach an agreement that suits you all and allows you to keep this guy in your life.
Of course, if your boyfriend causes a scene and refuses to let go a little whilst you try ti work this out, he's not right for you in the first place!
Good luck.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 December 2010): Unfortunately breaking up rarely happens without tears, but that is life. Like the other two have said just be honest with him, that's all you can do. Is there any particular reason why your parents want you to break up with him? If not then first things first you need to find out why. I know it is difficult at times to question your parents' authority but at the end of the day this is your life and without good reason they shouldn't be able to control you like that. You are still young but you need some freedoms! Talk to them before you do anything.
Good luck
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A
male
reader, Kenj  +, writes (13 December 2010):
 The best way to go about it is to be honest with him, tell him strait and your reasons why you can’t see him anymore.
When a relationship ends some one gets hurt unfortunately that’s life and sometimes it takes us where we don’t want to go.
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A
female
reader, Mjfbla +, writes (13 December 2010):
 Honey have you tried talking to your parents and explaing all this. What if they met him? If not then just tell him that your parents dont want you guys being together, but you still like him. You dont want the guilt of lying, but you want to be friends. Reassure him with good thingd(you still like him, you want to be friends, you dont want to lose him or hurt him, he was a good bf) And hope he understands.
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A
female
reader, wcarley  +, writes (13 December 2010):
be honest with him, that's the only way. Just explain the situation to him, honesty is always the best policy. best of luck to you.
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