A
male
age
41-50,
*ruce lee
writes: I don't want to turn into a doormat for other people but I have a question about gratitude. How do I become more grateful for things in life? Usually, we all feel better when we appreciate things. But sometimes, if you are too nice or show too much appreciation, people treat you like a doormat. So my question is how can I become a more grateful person and get the respect of others at the same time? Maybe I'm wrong about my theory on respect. But that's what I've discovered in life. If you are too kind, you will be taken advantage of. Thanks for your time.*Mod Note - this was submitted as an article but reads as a question to me and has therefore been posted accordingly - as a question, and with title changed to reflect that* Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (1 May 2010):
 Sorry,Bruce Lee, I had mistakenlyre assumed the letter was from a woman so I gave you "girlie" examples,lol.
But I guess you've got my point anyway.
True,there's a lot of energy vampires around and they are ready to draw your emotional blodd. But remember- nobody can enter into your life if you do not let them in...
A
male
reader, bruce lee +, writes (1 May 2010):
bruce lee is verified as being by the original poster of the question Well, I must show some gratitude here because I think Cindy put a fair amount of thought into her reply. It is true that if we are too nice, we can attract certain predators into our lives. I call them leeches. They suck up all the blood and time out of people. They don't listen to other people's sides of the conversation. They just talk, and talk, and talk.
I will however learn to be more appreciative of things in the world. That's the main thing.
And all the predators can "swim to the bottom of the ocean."
Thanks Cindy.
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A
female
reader, CindyCares +, writes (1 May 2010):
Yours is a broad question and I am not sure if I have got the point of it, anyway we can safely assume that "too much" is always a negative thing. Nice is good and shows self confidence. Too nice is not good ,it shows insecurity and need for approval, and will attract "predators "-of yr time,energy,money etc.
An example ? Compliments. When somebody tells you : Nice dress, or "youìve got beautiful eyes ", you don't answer " oh it's nothing much I got it on sale" or " You should see my sister's eyes, those are really fantastic". You smile and say :Thanks.
When a friend wants you to help her with something or to run an errand for her, and you cannot, you don't go out of your way to change your scheduke and suit her, you don't
start apologizing and giving tons of explanations why you cannot- you just say, I am sorry, this time I cannot help you.
If you lend something to family member and they are late on giving you back what they borrowed, you
do not keep quiet because they are family ",you just ask it back firmly and politely.
Maybe none of this examples has got anything to do with you, anyway the point basically is- be normally nice. Too nice does not work.
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