A
female
age
30-35,
*aggiex95
writes:i really, reallly like this guy, but he's a pretty good friend of mine. i'm worried that if i tell him or ask him out and he doesn't return my feelings, he'll pull away from me. also, his friend told me he liked me, but i have no idea if he was being serious...also, what would the best way to ask him out be? i'm really confused...help!! Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Angela.B  +, writes (30 July 2008):
 If we decide to tell a friend that we have feelings we always run the risk that we will push them away from us if they don't feel the same. The other side of the coin is that if they do feel the same we gain a boyfriend and hopefully a great relationship.
Often, when someone tells a friend that they like someone they do so as a way of testing the water. They know that word will get around and it's a safe way of testing what would happen if they told the person themselves. If the person finds out and goes "Yuk! I hate them!" they can laugh it off and say their friend got it wrong, and if they go "Yeah, I think he's nice" they know it's safe to ask them out.
So, there's a good chance that maybe he does feel something for you but is worried the same as you are.
I would suggest asking him if he fancies doing something (don't call it a date), like going to see a film. Make it clear it's just you and him. If he says no, well, you were just asking a friend to see a film, right?
If he says yes, then while you are out you can talk to him and see how he feels. It's still a risk, but if he wants to spend time alone with you, and is telling friends he likes you, it's probably only a small risk that he doesn't have feelings for you.
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