A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes: I'm wanting to move out of my parents house , I'm 16 and have a baby. I plan on living with the baby's father he has a place of his own. He already buys me everything and the baby, it would be better for us and we would finally feel like a "family".Any advice on how I could approach my parents and let them know this. What should I say? Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 June 2011): First off you have to have a plan that will show them it's a good idea. Moving in with the babies father just because you want to play happy families is not a good enough reason on its own OP.
The only way they'll be comfortable with it is if you show the right kind of responsibility and maturity by showing them how you're going to cope financially, what's going to happen with school, your future plans, babysitting arrangements for when he's at work and you're at school. You basically have to sit down with the father, plan and work out all the practical details of what's going to happen. How things are going to work for the next few years. OP "feeling like a family" is not a good reason on its own. This has to be a practical situation for you and your child. It has to be what's best not just what what "feels" good to do.
If you can better continue your studies by living at home for another year or two then that may be best. OP you may be a mother but you're still a school kid, having a baby doesn't make you an adult, it doesn't automatically mean that you and the father will even get on if you live toegther. Moving in with someone is a big step, given your age and the fact you have a baby, could make it a very stressful and frustrating ordeal. To ensure that's not the case you need to have a detailed plan. One that covers all the bases, one that shows this is bets for the baby on a practical level, one that shows that you can make it work and still be able to go to school or work.
A
female
reader, chickpea2011 +, writes (10 June 2011):
Hi,
You're a smart woman, don't need to think or plan anything. Just wait until they both look relax and in a good mood. The right time is important. What to say? Tell them exactly how you wrote your question. Its perfect.
You're smart and sweet. I am sure they'll understand and respect your decision. I know that they're your parents and that's why you're so nervous, but I am sure they'll respect your decision.
Explain, that you understand how they feel. That they'll prefer if you do the legal way, getting married. Other than that, how you ask your question, I feel is perfect way to approach. Mention the feel more like a family.
Good luck-wish you happiness and health with your new baby and new life
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