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Boyfriend fooled around with his 3rd cousin while he was a teenager

Tagged as: Family, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (10 June 2011) 3 Answers - (Newest, 12 June 2011)
A female United States age 41-50, anonymous writes:

does anyone else find it awkward and disturbing that my boyfriend fooled around with his 3rd cousin when they were young teens? He admitted to me some time ago that they made out, kissed, and touched, etc. He said they were about 15. Then one day, he was at her house, we were on the phone and he said she kept touching his butt and making comments. then another time, I was at waffle house with them and she turned her shirt around in the store and sort of flashed her breasts. he turned his head like, oh my! and she said oh hush, its nothing you haven't seen before. I found this odd. This woman also can not be trusted. She is dangerous. She is very 2-faced. I seen her tell her aunt I love you, then turn around to my boyfriend and try to talk him into putting sugar in her gas tank. she has even set him up before. I believe this is someoen that needs to be deleted out of our lives. We live together and are engaged. She is on his facebook and tries to contact him, but according to him, he never replies, but refuses to delete her. She will take what you say and run to report to the nearest person to cause drama and a problem. I don't trust her and I really wonder what really happened. I sometimes wonder if their relationship wasn't more than what I've been told. How do I deal with this person, when he still calls her family after all of this? Should I say, her or me. or should I just let it go?

View related questions: breasts, cousin, engaged, facebook, I love you

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (12 June 2011):

stick to your boyfriend,thats soemthing that happened a long time ago,youth can reckless. If he didn't love you,he won't tell u that part of his past. From the look of things he's just not the type to keep secrets from someone he thinks he can make a live with. Forget about the cousin,she's crazy and just wanna make life difficult 4 u but don't give her that pleasure

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (10 June 2011):

Get over it, it happened years ago. What did you as teenager you regret now? There are a lot of stupid things people do when they are young, but they get over it and make things right. Does he sleep with his cousins now? If not, you are keeping expired score cards that should be thrown out. Love him and be happy.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (10 June 2011):

I don't think that you should put him in a position where its her or you that's not really fair on him and would make things awkward at family occasions and make you look very jealous, which she would only get a kick out off, knowing that she can get to you through him so don't give her that opportunity.

Tell your Bf that you don't trust her but you trust him, 3rd cousins isn't really family so i don't think it would bother me that much and the fact that they were 15. I think that you may be reading too much into it.

The fact that he doesn't entertain her on Fb shows that hes not bothered about her and he probably has the same opinion of her as you do so try not to let her bother you because she prob only does it to get a reaction out of you, chin up :)

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