A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I guess my situation is the typical girl meets guy and has an interest but doesn't know how to go any further than that kind of situation. I've gone to this specific church building for the past two years and there has been this one guy there the entire time, though I'm sure he's been in the area longer than me. I've only really seen him in passing and never spoke to him to even introduce myself. Last Sunday though, I suddenly found myself next to him. I had been sitting kind of by myself and he came and sat right down. He shared the hymn book with me and I tried not to look directly at him pretty much because I was kind of nervous. I knew he was a really good singer and I didn't want him to hear my voice because I was kind of embarrassed. At the end, I was pretending to be very busy with my purse when he says, "Thanks for sharing a hymn book with me." I finally looked at him for real and surprising said something coherent. "Thank you for sharing with me," I said. He was the one that was sharing with me, after all. He asked me what my name was, I told him and then he told me his name as we shook hands. I may sound crazy for saying this but I've never had a handshake like that before. It was kind of like getting a really good kiss after hundreds of bad ones. My hand felt so nice in his. Yes, I am crazy for reacting to something like that. But, it's been a while since I met a guy that didn't give me a bad vibe. He gave me a normal vibe and didn't have me wanting to run for the hills.Question is, how do I approach him? It's near the end of the semester and I'm going to be out of town for a month after my last final. I'm not desperate and I don't want to come across as desperate. I just want to further our acquaintance before I decide if I want to be just friends or something more. Help? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, TimmD +, writes (22 April 2010):
 The easiest way for you to proceed is sitting next to him again. This can be done by maybe showing up a little bit later then usual so you can pretty much insure he will be sitting down first, and then make your way to him. Now, this isn't always a sure thing because you may not be able to sit next to him because someone else is there, but if you are that nervous then the direct route may not be for you. Find a way to sit next to him and if he reacts in a positive way to seeing you.
If you manage to sit next to him again once the service is finished, you can try getting up the nerve to say something like "So, can I share a book with you again next week?". It may be a slow process, but this is what is needed if you don't go the "I was wondering if you'd like to have coffee with me sometime..." route.
Good luck. :-)
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