A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Okay..I need some input/advice on my situation. My boyfriend just informed me that a female coworker of his admitted to him that she likes him as in having a crush for him...when the female coworker asked him what he thought... all he said was that he didnt have time to think about it and that he eventually became too busy at work to approach her and tell her the truth. how would u feel if your boyfriend did that? i mean, shouldn't his first response be that "im taken" instead of saying "i didnt have time to think about it"?!?! the reason why im posting about this is because this same boyfriend told me about his plan to propose within the next couple of months. how can you go from planning to propose to not acknowledging her? am i taking this way out of proportion or do i have a right to be hurt and get angry? what does this mean?
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female
reader, Another_Kapiti  +, writes (17 November 2009):
 Sadly some men are so oblivious to other women when they're in a committed relationship and I'd take this as a good sign! Your post is a little confusing and hard to understand, but I could suggest perhaps that maybe he wasn't really listening to her at the time and then just never really did anything about it?!
Remember, how you would react in the same situation is going to be different to how someone else would respond to that question, we're all different! I've noticed other women eyeing up my boyfriend all the time and he never even notices! Though he does notice when guys stare at me (not that I'm awesome or anything!) and I don't notice because I've only got eyes for my boyfriend!
Could also be because your boyfriend can compartmentalise easily? She (the woman who has the crush) has been filed into a completely different (box) than you, his girlfriend.
I wouldn't read too much into it, but I probably would mention it to him (just don't make a huge deal of it) and ask him what his answer would be (now he has time to reply!)
A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim  +, writes (17 November 2009):
 this other woman looms so large on your boyfriends radar his response to her declaration of having a crush on him was that he didnt have time to think about it
she was so important he didnt even give it a few seconds, let alone a minute.
Or have I misinterpreted your question and he is planning to propose to her?
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