A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: my boyfriend and i have been together for two years now. we are engaged to get married. i am for the most part content in our relationship. we have over come some obstacles. the only big issue that we are having still is our sex life. he has E.D. and a low sex drive. i ask to have sex and 98% of the time he rejects me and makes some excuse. i have offered to pay for a doctors visit to get medication. he still has not gone though. i have asked if he is not that attracted to me anymore. he says that he is and that he thinks i'm very pretty. i keep myself in shape and do things that i think will entice him to want to have sex but nothing works. we only have sex about twice a month. what can i do to improve things? or should i just settle myself into the fact this is the best it will ever be?
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (14 January 2010): He should really see a doctor as medication could make a huge difference.
A
female
reader, person12345 +, writes (14 January 2010):
I think you need to get this resolved before you agree to marry him. Sex is a big deal and a big part of a marriage. Until he agrees to fix this/work it out I think you should consider postponing the marriage. You need to figure out why he has E.D. at such a young age too. If it really is a physical block there are plenty of medications and things to help that. However, if it's mental or a result of a masturbation/porn addiction then he needs counseling. There are a number of things that could be causing this, but you should work through this before committing to a whole life together.
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A
male
reader, forever and ever amen +, writes (14 January 2010):
it sounds like because of his situation he has a very low self esteem. i think that it would be a good idea to be content with what you have. if you love him, sex ought to be one of many many things you love about him. it just all depends on how important sex is to you. or if sex in general is more important than sex with him. having said that, it sounds like he should definatly look into some medical help, even if its just for you.
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