A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:How can I win back my ex fiancee's trust? I cheated on her and fathered another women's baby but at the time I had a real problem with drink, now I just want to be back with my ex. I hit her, treated her with no respect and pretty much forced her to have an abortion but I swear I've changed and really want her back. She's my world - I was such an idiot but I can't live without her. I've stopped drinking and got a job, and she says if things were different, (she's in a relationship) then she'd think about it. I just can't see my life without her.
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reader, anonymous, writes (10 November 2007): I'm in your exes shoes. I broke up with my ex fiance a month ago because he was very disrespectful and emotionally abusive. I don't know if he cheated on me, but he probably did when he took a vacation for 2 months without me. He called a lot asking me to take him back and work it out with him and how sorry he was and said how much he loved me. But, I won't go back to him even though I loved him, and still might a little. Actually, writing this, I can say I don't love him anymore. If your ex feels like I do, we have been through too much and you guys need to realize that you have messed up, need help, and change takes a lot of time, but how can we trust you? I don't trust him and that he will ever change, and even if he did, he put me through hell, so I will never go back to him. If she truly respects herself she probably won't give you another chance. Abusers take a while to change.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 November 2007): Well ask her what she really wants. If she honestly says that she has moved on, you should leaver her alone. Remember that she has been really really hurt by you and so it is not really easy for her. If she is truly happy now and does not want to come back to you. You should respect her decision. The fact is you had your chance and you really messed up. She is trying to heal and if she wants to heal with someone else. Just let her be. That is if you really love her as much as you say you do. Take care.
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