A
female
age
36-40,
*mbbf
writes:[Mod note: the title selected by the poster "should i stay or should i go??" has been previously used.]me and my partner have been together for almost a year now but have known each other as friends for about 12 years and im 6 months pregnant with his baby. i really dont know if i still love him or not, i care so much about him but he tells me i keep trying to control him and ruin his life. he tells me he loves me all the time and he doesn't want to lose me but he knows the things he does will make me want to leave, i have left so many times before but always come back for his sake and my baby's. he has stopped drinking as much as he was before but says every week that he will give up completely. i gave him the benefit of the doubt yesterday again. he said he promised he would only be gone a couple of hours at mid day and he would be back because i wanted to talk through plans about our future and the baby but by midnight he still wasn't home. as you can guess i was not impressed and had the major hump so we had a row he told me im trying to control him and he lies to me all the time to keep me "sweet" and he is never going to change whatever he says he will do or not so i need to get over it. how can i get over it and start trusting him if i know he's going to continue lying to me. i really do care about him and our future as a family but i dont know if i love him anymore and i dont know if i should stay Reply to this Question
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (10 September 2010): If he hasn't pulled his life together for his sake, your sake, or his soon to be new kid's sake what makes you hold eternal hope that he will one day change? He isn't going to change unless he hits rock bottom. Your new priority will need to be your child. I would recommend leaving in a way to make sure you and your child have a good opportunity for a good life. Physical separation and distance should allow you to get your head straight. Being 6 months pregnant I am sure that isn't what sounds best, but after the child is born there will be less quiet time to figure stuff out. My recommendation is to move on.
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