A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes: Hey guys, I was wondering if you could possibly help me out? Recently I found out that my best friend's eleven-year old brother has a giant crush on me. I'm fourteen, so that would mean that he is in sixth grade and I am due to be in ninth. From what I've been told, he has a lot of pictures of me, and whenever I come over to visit my friend, he can't stay away from me. In fact, he has kissed me before, right on the lips. It surprises me because he touches me on the neck, shoulders, hips, and legs in the same way that a grown man would. Also, once we were all playing around and he locked me in his room with him. Sometimes I don't even know that he's eleven. I don't want to hurt his feelings because his family is so close to ours, but how can I tell him to ease up?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 June 2010): He needs to know when to stop. If you can't talk to his parents then next time he makes you uncomfortable you will need to confront him and tell him his behaviour is unacceptable.
A
male
reader, softy +, writes (19 June 2010):
i reckon u should just explain to him about the age difference and ask him about girls his own age that he knows. hope the advice helps. softy out
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 June 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you everyone who has replied! I will definitely tell my mum of this issue and get her thoughts as well. It just makes me uncomfortable as you mentioned and I don't want to push my friend away because of it. Thank you all!!!!
3 Shelby
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 June 2010): Yes I agree with Myrrh, get your mum to talk to his. He may be just 11, but I think the needs to learn, just because you have a crush on someone doesn't mean you can touch and kiss them there are boundaries, don't forget to tell you mum about the pictures too.
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A
female
reader, Myrrh +, writes (19 June 2010):
Hello. The best way to handle it, is to speak to your mum and tell her you really dont like the way hes behaving. Let her know its making you feel totally uncomfortable and is going to put you off visiting the friends house. Ask her to have a word with his mum for you. He doesnt seem to mind the fact that hes bothering you. But once he knows his actions are also bothering his family, he may well find it in his best interest to stop!! Some young lads can tease and be really irritating sometimes. I have 3 brothers. And remember very well how their teasing used to annoy me to tears when we were children. They werent behaving inappropriately as this lad is but the end result was the same. Me flustered and upset, them having an evil chortle. This lad may see you getting flustered, embarrassed ect and actually find it funny. So next time he tries to touch you. Say "No!" in a very loud voice and stare him down but dont let him know you are upset. Never be alone with him. And once you have spoken to your mum, if he still insists on behaving badly. Stop visiting your friends house and invite her to your home instead. I think you should tell your mum because he is a little young to be behaving as he does. His parents may be allowing him to watch films/tv that he shouldnt be watching at his age. Or they may be allowing him to use the internet without supervision. And its giving him some odd ideas. So do tell your mum and let the adults sort this out. Dont feel badly because you have to mention it. His behaviour IS very wrong but thats not your fault x
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 June 2010): just explain to him how you feel or tell him you have a boyfreind or something or maby even that he is to young for you and explain the diff in age and how that matters , anyway hope this helps
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A
female
reader, janniepeg +, writes (19 June 2010):
You can just tell him to stop or you'll tell his parents. You don't have to be afraid of hurting him because he still looks at you as a bigger sister. He just wants to see what it feels like to touch a girl and does not expect anything back. It's untimely to tell him to ease up because it looks like you were letting him to all this. Just tell him to stop.
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A
male
reader, MrIncredible +, writes (19 June 2010):
Honey, if he is making you feel uncomfortable tell him that, and say as you said here, to back off. Explain to him that he is too young to be doing that kind of stuff, and tell him that you'll tell his parents about him having pictures of you, having crush, etc. Kids like that will freak out if their parents find out. Tell his parents also that he has locked you in his room and kissed you. Hope this helps babe.
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