A
female
age
30-35,
*xtatorxtotxx
writes:Okay, soo I have a problem. My boyfriend has this thing where when we're making out he'll bite my neck.. HARD! I don't mind neck biting but it's just that he hurts lol plus my mom almost saw a hickey that didn't go away for a few days. I just want to know how I could tell him to be more gentle? I'm kinda shy around him so I wouldn't be able to just tell him. And it gets him so turned on he does it without thinking. Any help?
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female
reader, DrPsych  +, writes (22 August 2010):
 The human mouth is full of bacteria - this is why we need to brush teeth everyday. By biting you he risks breaking the skin and starting an infection in your neck, as well as permanent scar tissue. The reason why you don't see many 20, 30, 40+ somethings walking around looking like they have had a hot date with Vlad the vampire is because hickies just don't look good. In fact they look revolting and broadcast a sexual relationship to the whole world viewing them. I think if you are old enough to be in a physical relationship of any kind, you are old enough to assert yourself. Stop thinking of this as romantic activity and think of it as physical assault. He maybe hurting you due to sexual inexperience and lack of awareness of other ways of courting young ladies. It is time to sit down and tell him how you feel. If he reacts badly then he is an idiot and not worth dating! This serves as useful practice for later life. You have to learn to say no to anything you are not happy with, or risk becoming a victim to all sorts of abuse.
A
female
reader, OhGetReal +, writes (22 August 2010):
 Tell him if he puts another mark on you, your are going to punch him in the privates and ask him to get lost....well, maybe not...tell him that giving you a hickey is equivelant to a dog peeing on a tree. He's marking his territory and it is animalistic and immature and he has to stop biting you pronto.
That should do it and if he doesn't stop, stop making out with him, problem solved.
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