A
male
age
30-35,
*annyp
writes:hi i had to choose between 2 girls and now i've picked 1 but another one of my freinds asked her out and she rejected. Now i dont want to tell her how i feel in case it hurts his feelings and damages our freindship.i wont see her til saturday so i have time to think and i havnt told anyone that i feel this way about her yet how should i react ? i really dont want to hurt him but i also cant carry on secretly wanting her and flirting with her please help i always want what i cant have and i feel under alot of pressure as this other girl likes me too there is also a party next month should i try anything on valentines day?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 January 2010): well it really comes down to choosing some girl who rejected your friend and made him feel bad (which for some people would be enough to not mess with her)... and your FRIEND! i personally don't think it's worth it because girls come and go and there's plenty other out there, why out of alllllll of them must it be her specifically? besides, for all you know she just thinks your friend is ugly and that you're hot.. nothing to do with personality and that would show that she's shallow.
A
female
reader, ImJustTrinity +, writes (26 January 2010):
Be honest with this 'other girl'. Tell her you like someone else, but don't tell her you had to choose between the two of them. that won't help!
As far as your friend goes, you should talk to him. explain that although you know that he's been rejected, and you do feel bad for him, that you like this girl, and you would hope that he would be happy for you.
But if he takes it badly and doesn't want you asking her out, think to yourself, is she worth losing a friend over?
You need to think about who's more important to you, if your friend disapproves.
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