| A
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes: Hi there!I realy need some peoples advice. Me and my boyfriend have dated for about a year and a half ( also the age on this is wrong I'm actualy 17) and when we have sex I don't know if I have an orgasm or not. I don't even know what it's supposed to feel like. I lost my virginity to him and the sex we have is great and I'm realy happy with him but how can I tell for sure if I'm having an orgasam? Because there's times were it feels realy good for a short while ( by which I mean realy amazing compared to how good it already feels) but I don't know if it's an orgasm cuz it's not very long. Please help me. I need some people to help. Thank you I appreciate it.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 February 2011): There wouldn't be any question; You'd know if you you did.
A
female
reader, Blue Sahara  +, writes (2 July 2010):
 An orgasm is a release of body tension.
The feeling good during sex is the building of that tension. When your body can't take anymore tension it releases it in an orgasm. Tense your body up right now like you are preparing to be hit or something. Then relax. The relaxing is like an orgasm. It is a sense of "Ahhh".
The reason women have such a hard time telling if they have an orgasm is cause obviously their body can tense up more sometimes then others. If you are really turned on, your muscles get very tight and it makes your orgasm stronger. But sometimes that doesn't happen.
Telling your orgasm takes time and practice cause not all of them are huge. Sometimes it's obvious you had one. Sometimes it's not so obvious. But you'll start to learn your body. You will look for signs. Like your legs might get really tense, your toes might curl, and your grabbing onto something right before you have one.
Also you'll learn where you orgasm strongest. Sometimes a woman's muscles contract strongest in her back which is what you usually see in movies where a girl arches her back. Sometimes girls orgasm in their stomach or just their vagina. Sometimes it's all over.
Like most things in sex, if you stay focused on what you are feeling, you will start to learn what to look for. You'll also start to learn what can give you stronger orgasms just by listening to what your body wants.
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