A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:My adult daughter dumps every thing on me,she expects me to do as she says.I have grandaughter after school but dont want to look after for the holidays as myhusband likes to go out,we dont plan things but go where we want.also she turns up at any time,goes shopping,or beautitions without even asking if its ok to look after my granddaughter.How can I talk to her without her getting totally bent out of shape Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (2 July 2015):
 Sit her down and tell her, HERE are my boundaries. If we PLAN for you to drop her off, I will watch her, I will NOT watch her on the drop of a hat. YOU (to your daughter) CHOSE to have this child, while I LOVE to spend time with my grand-daughter AND help you out, I and your Dad have a life too. YOU need to do your job (as a mom).
Tell her your Dad and I will take vacation time week 30-33 (example) and will NOT be available for babysitting.
If she blows up, it's HER loss.
A
female
reader, Ciar  +, writes (2 July 2015):
 How does she get on with her father? This is your husband, yes, or have you remarried? Has he tried saying anything to her? What happens after she blows up at you? I'm guessing she doesn't speak to you for a while. Does she have siblings? Has she always treated you this way or is this a fairly recent thing? Does she work?Since she relies on you so much this should be easy to resolve. You withdraw the favours. If she shows up at your door unannounced have your husband answer and say you're out or asleep or unwell or just unavailable. He should say this on the doorstep. Don't even let her in.It's not as if she has anyone else to do her bidding so use it to your advantage.
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