A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:So my boyfriends eldest sister is in hospital and it's quite serious, I've told my boyfriend I'm here if he needs anything but I feel like I'm being useless at the minute and I could be doing much more to support and be there for him and his family. Any help or advice on what to do/say to them all? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Tisha-1  +, writes (11 February 2014):
 Cooking meals would be a big help, packing meals so that they can take them to the hospital might be something they would appreciate.
Cleaning the house so that it's ready for visitors is another way to help.
Offer to set up a webpage at http://www.caringbridge.org to help them keep family and friends informed as to her status.
http://www.carecalendar.org is another website that helps people get the help they need during crisis situations.
I hope she recovers fully. Best wishes.
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (11 February 2014):
 sometimes you can just listen.
but to help out at home you can
clean the house if they don't have maid service
cook and provide meals if they are staying at the hospital all the time and not eating properly.
run errands for the parents if needed.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 February 2014): Sometimes it helps when you just get out of the way. Ask your boyfriend how she's progressing. Call his mom, just to see how she's doing. Ask about her husband and the family.
Try to minimize calling or texting him; if you think he's at the hospital.
Girlfriends often feel neglected during times like these, forgetting it's not about you right now. Give him space.
He'll miss you, and he'll come to you when he needs to. Sometimes he will avoid you to hide his emotions, or because he can't let you see him cry. He has to stay strong for his family; and they are coming together to combine they're strength as a unit. They're not purposely excluding you.
Ask if you can pick up things, or run errands for his mother and his sister.
Bring the family healthy snacks to eat; while they're at the hospital visiting. Stop in and pay her a visit by yourself when you can. You don't have to make that a big deal, she'll appreciate the sentiment and the compassion.
What he needs from you more than anything is your patience, your smile, and comforting arms.
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