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How can I support her best now her dad has died?

Tagged as: Family<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (5 November 2007) 2 Answers - (Newest, 5 November 2007)
A male United Kingdom age 41-50, anonymous writes:

hey guys i need some advice on how to be more supportive and helpful to my gf during this tough time. Shes had a hard time this past year and now her dad has passed away. it wasn't expected and he wasn't ill. It has affected me as well because i've always seen her family as part of my own. its just shes crying alot now and obviously this is alot worse than other stuff that has happened so its affecting her alot more. Its just i know it sounds stupid more but being there for someone when they are upset and down doesn't come to me naturally and in the past if anything like this has happened when i was younger i did my best to avoid it. I really want to help her, we live together so i see her all the time. i love her and can't bare to see her like this.

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My wife has lost her dad and I want to help her. Anyone know how I go about this in the right way?


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A reader, anonymous, writes (5 November 2007):

The grieving process has to be gone through thoroughly or it will come back to kick her later on. Let her cry it out. Let her talk, shout and scream and hopefully there will be lots of it. She may have some pent up anger because her dad has gone. You just need to be there for her and put a caring arm around her. Love her and let her know that you love her to pieces. Tell her all the time that you are there for her and she call always rely on you. It will be tough for you, yourself and her family but this period has to be gone through. There is a light at the end of the tunnel and things will get better in time, but it wont happen overnight. Be strong for her and yourself.

take care

xx

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A female reader, A Cappella United States +, writes (5 November 2007):

A Cappella agony auntLet her cry. Don't be embarrased or turn away when she does; she needs to be emotional right now.

Hold her if she wants, give her space if she wants.

The best thing you can do is to let her know that you're there for her, and that whatever she needs you to do you'll do. Then just listen to her. She'll tell you what she needs if you ask.

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