A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:I have a good male friend - I would say our relationship is somewhere between friends and lovers. We only see each other occasionally, although I see him as part of my work at least once a week. Last year he needed me more because he was coming out of a bad divorce amongst other problems. The other day we discussed having dinner together and were talking and I suddenly noticed that he was looking in my eyes and his eyes moved to my lips and then back to my eyes. I'm used to him looking at me but he was REALLY looking at me. I would really like to move up a gear in our relationship and it gave me hope. I'm wondering how I can show this without being too direct?
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female
reader, lexilou +, writes (4 September 2008):
 I dont mean thats all we did by the way, it wasnt lunch one day and sex the next, it took months, honest!
A
female
reader, lexilou +, writes (4 September 2008):
Just take it slowly. Once you have had dinner, suggest your next meeting, let it build up into a relationship. Thats what normally happens when you are older. Its only the teenagers that say 'Will you go out with me'!!! My husband and I never discussed moving things up, it just happened naturally from lunch, to a night out, to sex, to him staying over a few nights a week and eventually never leaving. Things will progress if its right for you both x
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A
female
reader, dearkelja  +, writes (4 September 2008):
 I agree, just keep it at the friends level and let him make the moves. He is the one who has been through the bad times and he will make his move if and when he is ready. If you push him he will scare away. Enjoy what you have and secretly wish for more.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 September 2008): there could be chance that he doesn't want anything and asking could frighten him off. in my experience its never ended well. If your good friends theres no point in ruining it with a relationship. obviously he hasn't had sucsessful relationships as his divourced. If things are ment to happen between you they will naturally.good luck
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