A
male
age
36-40,
*organposh
writes:Hi. I've seen a few questions on here, and I feel like you guys probably can help me.if not. Please try. My wife and I have been married for four years, but were dating since our sophmore year in highschool. All my life I've dealt with an anger problem. During my childhood my parents sent me to all types of places to try to change that. But nothing worked... Most the medicines made me sick. ..but. This isn't what I need your help on.See. Two years ago. I guess I wasn't paying enough attention to my wife. And she cheated on me. After some counselling, some therapy, we got back together, she moved back in. But I never really let it go. Every argument from then on I'd through it in her face, even arguments that had nothing to do with other women or men, I'd bring it up so she'd stop getting on my case about stuff. Then I'd start calling her namess.. Like slut and whore and whenever she'd go to a friends or her sistes house I'd ask her before she walked out the door if she was gonna go sleep around again, one time I asked and she responded "yes!" I went crazy.I called her even worse stuff. And more. Recently she has left me and took our two year old daughter. I know I'm a dick. And a ridiculous guy but I honestly do love her. But. I can't help it. I just get so angry. I know she deserves better but I love her so much. I just has such a problem.. I know that when my little girl grows up that I wouldn't want her with a guy like myself. Cause I know she already deserves better. My wife has only spoken to me once only to say that I'm dead to her. And that I've managed to suck the life outta her. With my insults and disrespect when all she tried to do was make things right .I have apologized A LOT. Pleaded that things would change but she is not listening. Cause I really want to change. And I think with her support again I can ,Please help me in my situation. I know I'm a horrible person. And I'm a dick. So there's no need to tell me what I already knoe..
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female
reader, VSAddict +, writes (25 July 2011):
 In order for things to get better, you have to forgive her.
This has always been an issue for you and until you let it go, you will always be angry and feel the need to use that against her. Since you've already went through counseling, the only thing left to do is forgive. Don't try to see her or get her back until you can honestly say and feel that you've forgiven her and are no longer angry at her. She's trying her best, so always remember that she's sorry and she's trying to make it up to you. Hope I helped.
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