A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hey. One of my best friends thinks she could be pregnant, and she's been getting bad stomach pains for the last three days... I'm going to town with her at the weekend and we are going to get a pregnancy test. I'm worried about how to react if she is pregnant, and how to help her decide what to do. I don't want to pressurise her into doing what I would do in that position, which is keep it as I think abortion is cruel, because she might regret keeping it. If you could suggest how to help her that would be great! Thanks xo
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reader, anonymous, writes (2 March 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks everyone for your help. It's turned out she isn't pregnant, I kinda doubted she would be... I hope this shock will stop her from getting into this situation again because she's not stupid, and she knows what shes doing. Thanks again xo
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (28 February 2008): Just tell her you support her decision no matter what, and you'll be there for her and so on, but at the same time you can make it clear that you are pro-life. You should try not to force your views on her though, even if she decides she wants an abortion.
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A
female
reader, SarahCa1989  +, writes (27 February 2008):
 I had the same problem with one of my friends. All I did was be there for her and help her out as much as i can. If she is pregnant don't judge her differently like as a slut or whatever. Be very supportive cause she is going to need support if she is pregnant.
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A
female
reader, Robin Goode +, writes (27 February 2008):
She needs a med exam. You help her by encouraging her to get one. You are young so you may not be aware that stomach pains are NOT an early sign of pregancy. She may have another issue -- including appendix issues which may be life threatening. She should therefore seek help soon.I don't think she is pregnant. If she is, you help her by not giving her your opinion about what to do. A woman, and she is a woman, albeit a young one, must live with her own decisions. She should therefore find a person to talk with who doesn't have any stake in what she does -- a counselor at Planned Parenthood or other clinic (although not one of those anti-choice weird ones where they trick you into watching some video and tell you you are going to hell), would be best. Planned Parenthood does this kind of thing all the time, and they can help refer her to someone who can help her sort out her thoughts and feelings and get her some support.It may help you to see it this way. It's very easy for you to tell her "what I would do" since you are not her and never will be. But she is her own person, and, only she must live with whatever action she takes, not you. Tell her you want her to be at peace and you will be her friend.p.s. abortion isn't cruel, and you may be surprised to find that keeping a baby may be. Do some searching on your own, and you may find this experience to be one you can benefit from as well. Good luck.
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