A
male
age
36-40,
*chup
writes:I broke up with my ex girlfriend about 6 months ago. I'm 25 now and she is 21. I went out with her for almost 3 years. Our first two years was the best time on my life, we were so romantic and so on. We have so much in common and I loved her so much and im sure she did too. But third year we have so much arguing. so I decided to have break, and make us more far apart. We were on and off and one day she got tired of it and we broke up for real. AFter we broke up for 2 months i realize that I really miss her, i begg her to back with me, but she said its too late.So i got hard time to forget about her.. I did NC for like 4 months. It was hard.. I think i was 90% over her already, maybe not. So one day i have this day that I was missing her so much. That day everything i do i think about her. So I find out she seeing someone already. The crazy part is he is my friend and she told me before when she was still my gf that she wouldnt go out with that guy. So I feel i just broke up with again. I got hurted again. and i called her, and ask her if she really did go out with him. She said no. But I think she is lying to me because she wouldnt tell me.I made mistake calling her to find the truth. I thought i have move on but i guess not. I still have feeling for her. How come i have this jealousy?? How I can move on completely?? I believe she move on already cause she is with that guy!! Help..
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male
reader, uchup +, writes (15 June 2009):
uchup is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks guys..
But i know i need to move on..
The thing is the guy is my friend..
He told me that hes going to help me with her when we broken up.. but somehow they become close and like each other..
maybe they are mean to be?
I think I have this jealousy about them and make me wanna go back with her..
But I heard to get back with ex I need to accept to move on first and someday we can be back if we are meant to be?
I'm feeling fine now.. we go to same church.. if i see them at church.. i still feeling jealous..
A
reader, anonymous, writes (14 June 2009): Trust me, you aren't really broken up until (1) Your ex goes out and finds someone else, and you learn about it, and (2) YOU crash and burn and then go out and find someone else, yourself !!
That addiction to the relationship is still strong in your brain isn't it ?? I'm sorry to report, that your only choice is to move on, and make changes in your life so that NOTHING in your life or in your home reminds you of her. Remember that thoughts about her are negative, damaging thoughts. If she can find someone that easily, why can't you?? When you start thinking about her you're probably depressed and should do something to treat depression, like go outside in the sunshine, go exercise, or do something else to treat depression.
Meanwhile, you need to go out and make new friends, esp. a close female friend. You should find a new activity with lots of women - try taking an Art class or something. You need that emotional support, and you also need to look for someone to date and go out with.
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A
male
reader, joe26  +, writes (13 June 2009):
 sorry to hear that buddy...but the only way is to forget about her and move on. I know its hard but you gotta do it for you own good...she seems completely over you and decided to be with someone else. Don't be sad this is not the end of the world.
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