A
female
age
41-50,
*azzie1
writes:Don't know if I did the right thing. I just left my boyfriend of 4 years after him cheating on me twice cuz he said that we were having problems, thru physical and mental abuse.. I finally woke up and realized that I shouldn't allow him to do this and I changed my # it's been about 2 weeks and I feel that the majority of guys are all full of it because of what I experienced. I'm scared that I will not find my soulmate.. cuz know I have my guard up with men. How can I make myself believe that there are good men out there.. cuz my ex brainwashed me saying that I will never find anyone like him and know I'm scared.. Please Help!
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reader, anonymous, writes (16 March 2009): My fiance cheated on me. I thought it was the end of the world. It took me quite sometime to get over him but I did. During the healing time, I thought what you're thinking. But I'm hear to tell you that not all guys are the same. There are good men out there. You have to date and weed out the crappy ones. It takes time but good men are out there.
As for now, just take your time and get over your ex., don't jump into a relationship.
Good luck.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 March 2009): I went through the same thing.
My boyfriend has always lied to me about everything and mentally and emotionally abused me for three years. When I met him I was still naive, nice, optimistic, believing. After realizing how he conned me and used me and macks on women all the time I decided that not all men are potentially kind, many people are actually destructive and don't have the skills to be in a healthy relationship.
But, that hasn't tainted me at all. I meet good men all the time. I know there are some great men all around, you just have to keep your eye out for it by believing they are out there. I know someday I will be with a kind and honest man who is respectful and we'll be great friends. If I don't believe this, then it won't happen. I am approached a lot by very sweet, successful honest men and it feels great. While I do get hit on by the toxic ones, I now see the red flags right away and just kindly keep my distance.
I completely agree with Pointblank66; he says two key things: keep up hope and, the quiet ones are the nicest. Pay special attention to his advice. He's quite right.
Slough off any negative thinking about yourself and men and just keep that focus that it's out there, and you'll recognize it when it comes.
As a result of changing my attitude from what you are going through right now over to believing again, I actually am meeting quite a few gentlemen whom demonstrate healthy and productive traits.
Try the book: "As A Man Thinketh" (it's a little dated and religious, but you can filter that out) to keep your mind on the right track.
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A
male
reader, mr41 +, writes (16 March 2009):
 YOUR WORTH THE WORLD!!!!!
just remember that
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A
male
reader, Pointblank66 +, writes (16 March 2009):
Belive me, on behalf of all the guys that treat women with respect we are out there. Try going on a dating site, ask your friends if they know anyone, and above all keep up hope that you find someone because you will. And ps, the quiet ones r usally the nicest. :-)
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