A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: Ok here's the deal. My boyfriend and I have been dating for 2 and a half years now, everything was going fine until last october... my 18th birthday. I really wanted to go away on holiday with friends for my birthday and to cut a long story short my boyfriend's family are good friends with a travel agent so he was booking it. Things went belly up and I found out he'd been lying to me about going away and he'd never tried to book it... he was already going away with his parents but didn't want to tell me as he thought I would leave him. My parents were furious and didn't want me to get back together with him. Anyway we got back together as he seemed to have changed and I really love him so wanted to give him another chance and he said he wouldn't lie to me again. Things have been great between us, until 3 weeks ago when I found out he was going away this Easter and hadn't told me. It turns out he's only known for a week... but now my parents, mainly my mum, doesn't want me to be with him cos he'll never change and grow up and she's sick of being put through the worry and stress. But he has grown up a lot and I really do want to be with him... I can't see myself with anyone eles. I just can't have him keep lying to me. Mum and I keep arguing about it. When I have been out with friends and he's there she interrogates me when I come home to see what he's said to me and what I've said to him. No matter what I tell her she's never happy and has a go at me saying that I'm stupid if I take him back and I just feel like no matter what I say has been said or happened, it's never going to be the right thing unless I leave him for good.How can I make my parents trust him again and how can my boyfriend prove he has changed?
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female
reader, ilovebowsandcherries +, writes (9 April 2009):
fair enoughthen you need to think to yourself can you trust him to not lie?and can you see a future with him?if you do then your parents shall just have to respect your wishes and let you live your lifeif not then they will be there to look after you until you do find someone who doesn't lie....but they should respect your choice as it is your choice not theres.your a big girl and can look after yourself and they should let you deal with your life in your own way.but only you can make the choice the sooner they realize your decision the sooner they'll back off :)hope this helps
A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 April 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI know he's only known a week as i asked his mum after i found out he was going.
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A
female
reader, ilovebowsandcherries +, writes (9 April 2009):
to be honest how do you REALLY know he's changed?i mean you say he has now told you he's going away for Easter and has only known a "week" but how do you know he never knew before that?i mean your parents are only looking out for you they just want the best for you in life they don't want you taking for a fool..and the majority of guys never change anyways they say they have and it's just a load of bull to be honest.and as you've said he has already lied about the easter how do you know he won't lie about other things?i'm not saying for you to end it and i'm not being nasty i'm just saying if he's already lied when he's said he has changed then how can you really trust he has changed?fair enough your mum shouldn't be butting in like this at the end of the day your life your choices she should just support you but she is just looking out for you hun.you really have to dig deep down to your soul and think do you really trust he has changed?and can you really trust that he will not lie to you again?i mean he's already started now.you really need to think long and hard hun.she only wants the best for you.Hope this helps.
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