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female
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anonymous
writes: Ok so me and my boyfriend have been dating for 2 years and he has no idea about being romantic!!I don't know what to do i love him to death but he never does anything romantic. Now don't get me wrong he shows plenty of affection but he never surprises me with anything even if it was just going to dinner or buying me flowers. his excuse is he never has a money but does he really have to have money to surprise me or be romantic i say no because he could always just make dinner for me and put our song on and dance with me but he never thinks of anything like that so how do i make him more romantic?
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reader, anonymous, writes (14 February 2008): Sweetheart my boyf is the exact same!! Yeah I'd love for him to surprise me with a w/end away or something like that but even for my b/day or Christmas its like pick out what I want and I have learned to live with it over the last 2 years! I won't get a valentines card today but he shows me in other ways how much he cares and loves me thats all that matters really!! Its how how he treats and respects you that matters more than what he does or doesn't do for you. If he as abusive or treated you badly but was still romantic and all that, how would you feel??
A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (14 February 2008):
 Generally speaking most guys are unromantic and predictable.You will have to lead him on what you need.
They are like rough diamonds and need your polishing to make them shine.
Not all men are born romantics.
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A
female
reader, Sweet-thing  +, writes (13 February 2008):
 It's learned behavior. Behind every romantic guy is probably a string of women who taught him over time what women like, and how they expect to be treated. Romance doesn't usually come automatic to most guys. But it comes more easily to those who had sisters or at least a father who modeled this behavior towards their Mom when they were growing up. Keep preaching sister, just don't nag. Sometimes it's more affective to show than tell. If you do romantic things for him, he may eventually start getting ideas on how to reciprocate. Be sure you also include plenty of little things that don't cost a cent. I wish you the best.
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