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How can I make going down on my boyfriend more comfortable for myself and him?

Tagged as: Sex<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (13 August 2012) 8 Answers - (Newest, 14 August 2012)
A female United States age 30-35, anonymous writes:

Im 18 years old and my boyfriend likes when I give him a blowjob. But he's too wide to fit in my mouth. He keeps trying to push me down farther but everytime I try my teeth hits him and I choke. So what can I do to make the situation more comfortable with my boyfriend and me.

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A male reader, Hennessy1989 United Kingdom +, writes (14 August 2012):

Hennessy1989 agony auntIf he knows you can't fit it all in then why is he still pushing your head down, blowjobs are great but you don't need force the whole thing down someone's throat to enjoy it, he's treatin u like a sex toy

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A male reader, DoubleM United States +, writes (14 August 2012):

DoubleM agony auntIt's unacceptable. Not just rude but violent. I'd suggest another boyfriend.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (14 August 2012):

Like the others said, the pushing is a problem, it's probably impossible to relax enough to do it if you have to worry about being forcibly choked.

...Other than that, I'd recommend breathing through your nose.

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A female reader, chigirl Norway +, writes (13 August 2012):

chigirl agony auntFirst off, NO PUSHING. His hands are NOT to be on your head at any point. Make this clear. You take him in your mouth if and when YOU feel like it. There shall be no pushing.

Don't try to fit him in your mouth if it's physically impossible. Lick instead, and rub with your hands, boobs etc. Play with the head of the penis, and maybe you can take the head of his penis inside your mouth? Most guys don't really feel much from being fully in your mouth, that's just some visal stimulant + porn has made it into a fad. But it doesn't do much for the guy, and he has much more pleasure from you lickinga round the rim and top of the head, and then stroking him with your hands at the same time. That's the trick that will make him get there.

And try to lick his balls or take his balls into your mouth. Be careful with your teeth. Make him shave his balls if it's too hairy for you. He will love it, the balls are very sensitive and whenever I do it I get a veeery positive response... But most guys wont ask you to do that, as they have no idea how nice it is until you do it.

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A female reader, Ciar Canada +, writes (13 August 2012):

Ciar agony auntSome good advice already given here. I'll add my two cents.

1. You could reduce the number of times you perform fellatio and the duration. It's not necessary to make it part of every sexual encounter and you don't have to keep at it until he climaxes. Remind him it's a treat and not a birthright.

2. Warn him that if his hand touches your head again, you'll bite. No further explanation is necessary.

3. Find a position you're most comfortable with and use that one. You don't have to fellate him from every angle.

4. Really this should be number one. Re-evaluate your own philosophy about pleasing your boyfriend. You NEVER do things that cause you discomfort or expose you to risk solely for the pleasure of another. Many women out there won't perform fellatio at all and they still get dates and men still find them desireable.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (13 August 2012):

You could try just focusing on the tip of his penis with your mouth and tongue and use your hands for the rest. Don't try (or let him try!) to fit it all in. Sometimes it's just not possible.

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A female reader, So_Very_Confused United States +, writes (13 August 2012):

So_Very_Confused agony auntwhen you are doing it are you putting your hand or hands on the base of his penis... it will prevent your boyfriend from pushing your head down more (I think many men try to do that)

use your hands and your mouth and your hands can be a buffer to protect you from gagging...

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A reader, anonymous, writes (13 August 2012):

Well, i don't want to sound like a jerk, but your boyfriend trying to push you down farther, knowing that you can't fit him in your mouth is somewhat rude. Maybe you should try to find an alternative to blowjob (there are many ways to do it without your mouth or vagina) or discuss about it.

It isn't recommendable for you and your boyfriend to try stubbornly already knowing that you choke with it.

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