A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:We've been married for almost 15 years and together for 19. We have 3 beautiful children that I love more than anyone could know. But my problem is that I love and worry about him just as I do my children. Sometimes I feel like he is my troubled teen. He's been in so much trouble through the years and in and out of jail for drugs etc. But dont get me wrong through the years on and off I did them with him as well. I just finally grew up and realized that my children and work are really whats important in life. And than of course the most important I got God in my life. Then we became not so compatable. But no matter what Im always there to bail him out. I work and take care of the family when he wont. Always listing to the lies he comes up with when Im accusing him of using drugs again. But then I catch him in the next lie. I guess I'm his enabler but I dont know how not to be. I've tried leaving with the kids several times and we will stay gone for a week or two but I can't get him out of my mind or my heart. I love him so much. I worry that somethings gonna happen to him if I do go. It is kinda like leaving one of my children behind. I know that sounds crazy but I love him that much. I know that I'm better off without him and if I could ever get over him I would have a greater chance at a happy life but Im not strong enough to leave him and take my children. I wish God would take over and cure his addiction like he did mine. I'm so heart broke and I won't a happy life for my children. When I know deep down inside that if you dont have trust in your relationship you can never be really happy. And I can say without a doubt that it is an everyday struggle with me and all his lies. Im miserable and stupid for loving him. But he's my addiction. What can I do?
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female
reader, misfitschik66  +, writes (8 February 2009):
 dear sometimes making hard decisions end up being the best decisions
my ex did alot of drugs and drank ALOT
he was a skizophrenic and he just wouldn`t get the help when i asked him too
as much as i loved him and as much as i still do for the rest of my life
for my unborn babies future mine and hopefully his i left him
i ask myself everyday was it a mistake
but i know for the baby it the best thing i could have ever done
you need to ask yourself the same thing
i really hope my advice helped
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