A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:My girlfriend has really low self esteem that I think stems from lack of parenting in early childhood and some abuse. I can't stand her being so hateful towards her beautiful body. What are some ways to help her overcome these issues?
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female
reader, Tig  +, writes (23 April 2009):
Hey there I have to say I agree with the answers you have already got although i must say i also think ur girlfrind needs to speak to someone proffessional if her problems relate to something in her past. I have been in the same situation myself I went through a very traumatic experience when I was young and I felt very messed up. I hated my body and never felt confident in myself i used to use sex to my advantage when it came to guys which i hope your girlfiend has not done. However when I met my current boyfriend over a year ago(the longest relationship I have had) my opinion of myself soon began to change. he is such a loving guy and so easy to talk to i found myself opening up and telling him exactly what was bothering me and how i felt. My boyfriend supported me and constantly reasurred me that i was special gorgeous and the girl he loved. this was such a great help to me and without his support i dont think i would be the person that i am today. Just make sure your girlfriend knows that she can talk to you about anything and that you will love her no matter what because she is the only girl for you. As for her body image issues i always find that when my boyfriend surprises me with visits to ann summers and other sexy shops my confidence soars because I know he has taken me there because he loves my body and wants me to show it off... try it some time it works... i hope this has been some help to u. please let me no how u get on....
A
female
reader, summerslady21 +, writes (22 April 2009):
I've Got to agree with armywife! Be supportive and just do what ever it takes to make her understand that u love her for her and wouldn't change her at all. I also put myself down all the time. My husband has made it a point to tell me all the things he loves about me! It has helped a lot! Now I wear shorts and bathing suits I even started wearing nighties all of the things I never wore before!! Just do the little notes or texts reminding her she is beautiful. Honestly she will see that she is amazing to you and that you are the only one who's opinion matters
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (22 April 2009): You can help her, but i believe that the only person who can fully heal her, is her.
Patience helps. I know it's frustrating when she puts herself down time and time again (especially because they it may be causing other issues with her being afraid that you're looking at other girls), but try very hard not to get angry with her or yell at her for acting like this all the time. Try to understand that while it is annoying for you, it is the most aweful feeling in the world to her.
Tell her she is beautiful, but only when you really mean it, and on more occasions then only when she asks or puts herself down.
Send her a sweet text every now and then (my man does this every morning) that starts with "goodmorning beautiful" and then say whatever you want to say.
Give her very speecific details about exactly whay you like about her appearence/body.
Just overally, be supportive and kind to her. In time, such a constant attitude may start to turn her around a little bit.
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