A
female
age
30-35,
*oopylucy
writes:right so theres this guy who likes me, and pretty much every weekend since decemeber we have hooked up, nothing serious just like made outanyway i told him in feb i don't like him, and that i like one of his mates, who i've got with quite a few times and also slept with, he was my first timeif i'm ever out and the guy i like is out i have got with him, only problem is that the guy who likes me tries to stop it every time, and we all always end up having a huge argument about it and it ruins the nightthe guy who likes me told me like a week ago that he loves me, and that's when i realised i seriously need to take hold of the situation because its got too far.i know i've led him on, and i'm not excusing my behaviour but i'm not the only one to blame in this, since he has known for ages my feelings and is still persistantly like this, but want it to end, i just dont know how to do itim trying not to lead him on but no matter how many times i say i'm not interested and i like someone else, he still tries it on, and he still ruins me and this other guy, even the other guy is starting to say he treats me like crap and doesnt understand why i put up with itits got to the point now where he will follow me around when we are out to make sure i dont do anything with the guy i actually do like, because apparently i deserve better, but i dont see how he has the right to try and control me, and that its any of his businessbut yes i just want some ideas as to how i can get him to leave me alone Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (24 April 2011):
 He, as any other citizen, has the right to go to any public place as long as he's not harassing you or threatening you physically. Treat him as transparent. You can't stop him from following you and he can't stop you from kissing the guy like. He will eventually stop when he sees that his presence does not affect your life any bit.
A
male
reader, N91  +, writes (24 April 2011):
 I am in the EXACT same situation, but I'm the other guy (The guy who you like in your case).
The other guy constantly argues with the girl, has also resorted to following her in the past and has threatened me with violence when he found out that we had been meeting (We used to be friends).
She had met him before as friends, told him that she didn't want more, but she also did things with him in the past, that she has directly told him that she regretted, yet he is still trying to get her to notice him, with him going to outrageous lengths making himself look a complete dick and I really don't know how she is even friends with him anymore! She says she doesn't like him and he is really annoying but still speaks to him and stuff.
I've derailed a bit from your original question, so here goes: Yes, you have led him on and you were wrong to do so as this is giving him false hope, but you have to take control and just tell him no, tell him you only want to be his friend (if that's true) or you will ignore him completely as you don't want to be with him and he is spoiling your happiness with the person that you actually do like.
It's already gotten out of hand by him following you, that is extremely wrong on his part and very weird, don't let it get to the stage that it has done for me, tell him firmly, NO and he has to deal with it or he risks even ending a friendship between you two.
...............................
|
