A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:How can get over my nerves in the bedroom and get some confidence? I've been with my partner a while now and the sex is great between us, hes incredible at everthing he does and I want to return the favour but I get so nervous I chicken out. I feel like im selfish as he spends alot of time on me before we have sex and I really want to give him hand jobs and go down on him, the thought of it turns me on but when we are in the moment, I get so nervous about starting it I cant do it. I feel that once I start it I'll be fine, but I cant get over that nervous barrier to actually start. See im not very experienced whereas he is so I know hes had alot of girls that are really good and experienced ar it and im worried I'll disappoin him.How can I get over this and do what I want to do to him?
View related questions:
confidence, hand-job Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, idoneitagain  +, writes (13 November 2012):
Probably all you really need to do is tell him. If you tell him you want to do those things with him but that you become incredibly nervous in the moment, I am guessing it will release a lot of the tension you have around doing it. You might still be nervous, but it will probably be diminished, and you will feel more comfortable with him. At some point you'll take the leap of faith, and it will be fine. Communication is a huge part of growing sexually with your partner.
A
female
reader, citadel  +, writes (13 November 2012):
Tequila, a pair of nylons, soft light, and some creativity.
And knowing that you can do no wrong, a guy will never not like anything you do to them. Never this side of total S&M and that's a thin line too.
...............................
A
female
reader, person12345  +, writes (13 November 2012):
 When it comes to handjobs, a lot of the pleasure just comes from the fact that you are touching him with your hands. It's just a turn-on that they aren't his hands, they are attached to a girl he finds attractive. If you don't plan on having sex later, get out some lotion and if you do want to have sex, use a silicone or water based lube. Just be sure to get enough on there and put some on if/when it feels sticky. Ask him to put his hand over yours to guide it at first, that will help you know what to do. After the first or second time he does this it should help you see that it's nothing to worry about.
Blowjobs are even easier than handjobs imo. Remember you do not want to get the whole thing in your mouth. If you're gagging it's way too much. The head of the penis is where the most nerves are and that's all you need to focus on. You only need to go maybe an inch past that. Just make sure you have enough saliva and either lick it or suck or or move up and down. You can also sort of "make out" with it and lots of guys like that. Then with one hand, rub the shaft.
...............................
|
