A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Okay..I don't really know how to put this.I'm just really messed up right now. I was with this guy two years ago I loved him more than anything and I gave him my heart only to have it thrown back in my face.Now ever since him I have had two relationships the first one being with Guy#1 coming to and end purely because after a year I still wasn't over this guy who basically broke my heart.And Guy#2 i'm still with after 8 months I think I love him i'd like to say I do but ever since I got with that guy who messed me about I just get to a point in relationships where I start to doubt the whole thing and wonder if I really do love them and then I start acting off with them.I'm sorry if this isn't making sense i'm just really upset and messed up right now.I don't deserve to be with anyone who am I to mess with guys feelings like that and break their hearts and treat them like they mean nothing to me. The guy i'm with right now means a hell of alot to me.I just can't help being like this.I don't want to hurt him or anyone else. Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (17 July 2007): If he he means alot to you, do not let him go. You are doing the right thing. You have been going out and meeting and being with other people. Remember, you know what it is like to have your heart thrown back at you. Do you want to do that to someone else? Keep an open mind, and do what is going to make you happy. Do not let the past control your actions. Good luck.
A
female
reader, sadinboston  +, writes (17 July 2007):
 You have to let go of the pain and let love in again. But if you can not feel it with a new person, then maybe you are trying to hard. Maybe that is not the right person for you. Love should be an easy thing, but it is often not. You need to ask yourself...is he treating me good? Does he make me feel good about myself? Is there any logical reason not to trust him? And of course...ask yourself to dig deep and think hard about your true feelings for him. Maybe you are just trying to avoid being alone?
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A
male
reader, schweg +, writes (17 July 2007):
 hi , i think there are a couple of issues that are hanging around. trust and love. to trust is to risk and you have been burnt, but not to take the risk is sometimes worse. honesty between you and your current man is vital. ask him what he feels towards you and tell him about your real fears and concerns and yes your feelings towards him too. but also to love someone else you must ultimately love yourself first. you are not messing anyone up uless you lie to them , you are very scared at the moment and feel very vulnerable, we do strange and sometimes perplexing things when we are in this very cold and scarey place. all i can say is talk and take your time. what would ease the fears, if you know that tell him. also you are stil very young , i am in my fortys and my girlfriend(of five years) has left me because i could not show her what i truly felt (other reasons too). time will heal all wounds as long as we can look at them.......it will all come good........thats what i have to believe.......
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