A
female
age
22-25,
anonymous
writes:There's a guy I'm interested in but I just can't seem to get him to notice me. I try to talking to him, flirting, touching, writing him some steamy notes, but he just won't respond. I asked him to our school Valentine's day dance and he turned me down flat. He either ignores me, tells me to leave him alone or sometimes, curses at me. I just don't get it at all. He doesn't have a girlfriend and hardly even talks to the other girls in class. Others are hot for him too because he's so good looking, but he doesn't seem to care. How can I get him interested in me?
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crush, flirt, notice me Reply to this Question
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female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (16 February 2017):
 You can't. You need to accept that he has no interest in you and move on. Don't allow yourself to look desperate and needy. He obviously doesn't like any off the girls showing interest. Just leave the poor guy alone.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 February 2017): I'm so sorry sweetie; but if you've tried everything and he isn't noticing, it means he is ignoring you on purpose.
This is the hard part for people your age. It seems like flat-out rejection or meanness; but it doesn't mean you're not pretty enough, or not good enough. It means you may not be his type, or he could already like someone else. He may be super shy and just wants you to stop!
It isn't your fault, you shouldn't let anybody make you feel bad about yourself, and if you do; you're not ready for dating. Why? Because being ignored or not being someone's type is a part of dating and growing-up. You aren't interested in every boy who wants your attention. Whatever reasons you have, are the same for anyone else.
You now have to learn to take "no" as the answer, and not let it hurt your feelings. Everyone you crush on may not feel the same towards you. That's how it goes sometimes, but we have to be strong enough to shrug it off without letting it hurt. Never let anyone know ignoring you hurts your feelings. Just fake that you're okay, until you are.
Don't try anymore. Just ignore him! Resist any urges you feel to look at him, or to try and get his attention. There will be other boys, and they may notice you first!
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A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim  +, writes (13 February 2017):
 Oh my gosh Girl! He is not interested, doesn't the fact he even curses you tell you that, why is that not sinking in?
You need to stop your crazy pursuing, he is NOT INTERESTED!
Who cares if he doesn't have a girlfriend, its not against the law is it? Leave him be, if your crazy obsession develops any further you might find yourself up before a judge on stalking charges.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 February 2017): Some women seem to think that that harder they try without letting up, that eventually the man will cave.
This doesn't always happen. And especially not in this case.
I would be moving on and preserving my dignity. I am sure he thinks very little of you right now. Is that how you think of yourself too?
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A
female
reader, Andie's Thoughts  +, writes (12 February 2017):
 Firs time of all, steamy notes should be saved for being in a relationship or FWBs (when you're older). You don't send someone steamy notes when they aren't even interested in you.
Also, you're kind of harassing him. I know you have a crush on him, but he's telling you to leave him alone, cursing at you and ignoring you - what about that makes you think he'd be interested?
I'm sorry, OP, but you need to get over him before you cross a line and get embarrassed. This behaviour isn't healthy for you.
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A
female
reader, Anonymous 123  +, writes (12 February 2017):
 He *has* noticed you; he just chooses to ignore you because he's not interested and he couldn't be more clear about it. Please leave him alone. Show some self respect.
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A
male
reader, N91 +, writes (12 February 2017):
 Honeypie is right, you need to leave this guy alone, it sounds like it's getting borderline obsessive.
He's clearly NOT interested, if us random strangers on the internet can see that, then why can't you when you're the one doing all this stuff?
You need to find someone else who responds positively to your advances, but in the meantime you need to leave this guy alone.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (12 February 2017):
 OK OP, you need a little reality check here.
THE guy is just not interested in YOU. Just because YOU have a crush on him doesn't mean he HAS to feel the same way, this guy obviously doesn't.
I know that isn't what you wanted to hear, but MAYBE you need to have a little respect for HIS feelings.
HOW would you feel if some guy you ABSOLUTELY didn't like kept chasing you? You wouldn't like it, right?
So why would it be OK for you to try and FORCE your emotions on to him?
WE have all had crushes that were one sided. It happens. And when it happens we NEED to accept it and leave them alone.
You can't "male" him interested in you. He either is or isn't - and in this case - he isn't. He HAS noticed you but NOT in a good way.
My advice? Stop wasting your time chasing after a guy who doesn't give 2 figs about you.
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