A
female
age
30-35,
*han x3
writes: well, there's this guy that i've fallen very hard for. we had a "thing" for each other back in october, and it started back up again about 2 months ago, and then he gradually stopped talking to me. i talked to this girl i kind of know one day for advice about him, and she brought to my knowledge that he may have fallen for one of her best friends. when i talked to him about her, he acted like he wasn't REALLY into her, but he did have something for her, i'm sure. i just want to know what i can do to catch his attention, something that i know will set me apart from her. i've already made up my mind that i'm not giving up on him, just please help me!
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 July 2008): Well, in your particular circumstance, the best way to get his attention is by IGNORING him and moving on with your life and giving him no importance whatsoever in your life. I swear I am not lying and I am not just saying that. I am actually giving you really GOOD advice, that WILL work to your advantage, (even though its not what you want to hear).
I'll even explain why. He left you for another girl. What does it say about you if he knew that you still wanted him and were chasing him even after he did that to you? It tells him that you have no dignity and that he can walk all over you. A guy doesn't want a girl with no dignity by his side. No way.
So forget wanting him. You don't want to start showing him weakness in you. You want him to want YOU. Men don't like girls who don't have dignity or who want them so bad that they will let him walk all over her. Its too easy, no challenge, and it makes you look bad. But they do like girls who they can't figure out, and who pose a challenge for them and they have to chase a bit. If you chase this guy you are going to make a fool of yourself.
If you really want him to take notice of you, you HAVE to move on and act like he is the least of your concern, and even convince yourself that he is. Men want what they can't have. So if he starts dating this girl, but then he sees you looking gorgeous and having effortlessly moved on with your life, he might want you back. But you have to act nice and cool. Be super nice to him and kill him with kindness. That might make him want you.
A
female
reader, lah mouw +, writes (8 July 2008):
Before it's too late, you might want to tell him straight out how you feel. That's pretty much all you can do. People have this "bright" idea that trying to compete with other girls to get noticed will get them what they want but it's just a waste of time when they could just be saying how they feel.
You have nothing to lose, what's the worst that can happen? That he doesn't feel that same way about you anymore? SO WHAT!? Just be happy you had what you had with him and hope that you guys can stay friends.
Tell him how you feel and keep him interested. Guys seem to have a short attention span. Try and help him remember what you guys had.
good luck!
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