A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I think my bf of 4 years has cheated on me with a prostitute.I asked him, he denied know but I im having a problem believing him so. How can I go about finding out?
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cheated on me, prostitute Reply to this Question
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male
reader, Danielepew  +, writes (17 October 2007):
 From your information, he may have had sex with a prostitute. They were available and he might be hiding information about money. However, I think this could happen at home, too. There are prostitutes in every country. The fact that they are available does not mean you will go with one.
On the other hand, even getting tested could mean all, or then nothing. He could be infected with an STD, yes, but, how would you know when he caught it? And, you don't mention when he traveled abroad. I understand that some diseases (notably AIDS) are not detectable before a certain "window period" has elapsed, so, if he traveled, say, a week ago, the test would show nothing anyways.
Why do you think that he cheated on you? I'm afraid that your post does not really allow for a conclusion on this. Was your relationship rocky before he left?
And then, just for the sake of information, and, I swear, without any intention of scaring the poster who spoke about STD's, you can catch these diseases from anyone. In some countries (where I live, for example) housewifes get infected more often than prostitutes. The reason is, pros get tested often and take care of themselves because they know they are at risk; housewifes don't take precautions because they think they have nothing to be scared of.
A
male
reader, Jamer70 +, writes (17 October 2007):
 i think the only way you can tell if he did is if he admits to visiting a hooker or you actually find the hooker he visited.
First ask yourself why you think he visited one and then see if you wanna ask him one more time.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 October 2007): Yikes.
Well first things first- don't have sex with him until he is checked for STDs.
Second- Ask him why he isn't close sexually anymore (don't say "are you not having sex with me because you had a prostitute?" - raise it as a separate issue).
You've been together for 4 years so you should be able to instinctively tell if he is lying or not.
Third- if he DID buy a prostitute, dump his ass. That's risky behavior and if he does stuff like that he can put you BOTH at risk for serious STDs.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 October 2007): Hi: replying to my post.
I think that he cheated with prostitute since he came back from a work trip from abroad and the hotel he stayed at was full of prostitutes(based on hotel reviewers. When he was away he acted odd, didn't call and email.
So i called him and all i got was his answering machine. So i txt him once per day and he would reply to my txt late in the mornings. Also, he's being secretive about his banking and how much he took out from Abm/atm machines which usually he pays only by charge cards and this time he didnt.
He's not that close anymore sexually too, plus he started to get spots on his body similar to ezcema.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 October 2007): Why do you think he had a prostitute? Does he have a receipt or something? Haha
Um I don't know.. I'd need more details to properly help you. You asked, he denied... Maybe he is telling the truth, maybe not.
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A
male
reader, Tommy7  +, writes (17 October 2007):
What evidence do you have now?
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A
male
reader, Collaroy  +, writes (17 October 2007):
 Hi,
you have to tell us why you think he cheated with a prostitute first before anyone can offer advice on how to get him to own up.
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