A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:A year ago I was working for a large publicly held company - when they hired a senior manager and let go my original manager that hired me. As soon as she started working no more than two months in the job she started criticizing my work- micro managing me to the point where even on IM message she would call out a typo. It was clear this woman did not like me and I don't know why because I tried so hard to do what she wanted to keep my job - three months in the job we had a one on one like we usually do and long story short she let it slip in the meeting that my role was going to be eliminated - basically she was like start lookign( even though) I was a permanent employee. Long story short I went to Human Resources they denied everything and told me that wasn't the truth but I felt so uncomfortable that they laid me off and paid for severance - she flat out denied she said anything to me - she denied that she was trying to fire me. Now my problem is this situation has traumatized me- it sounds like a movie but it wasn't - and I don't know how to respond to something like this if it happens again? I don't know what I did wrong because no matter how hard I tried she wanted to replace me and she tried to find stupid ways to fire me- how can I stand up in the work place? I have fears I will have another boss like this and even though I try to do what I'm told - it didn't amount to anything ? She was a bully and I just get so intimidated when it comes to work since it's a source of income Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, judgedick  +, writes (7 July 2017):
 Without proof, you are going nowhere, some people just can't help it they are full of their own ignorance and don't even see that they are bully's, So if you want to do anything you will need to have something to show them, but it is against the law to record someone without they knowing so you are stuck in a hard place,
The first thing you must try to do is put in behind you as this if I read it right was a year ago, pull with her if you can, if it is too hard the only thing to do is look for a different job,
A
male
reader, olderthandirt  +, writes (7 July 2017):
 You've assumed that you did something wrong? It could just be a case of a Dumb S***T boss (man or woman-it makes NO difference!) There are millions of people ( men and women) that have promoted beyond their level of competence. You'll see them everywhere so get used to it. Deal with the problem by doing the best job you can do and maintaining your composure. Secretly you know the truth.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (7 July 2017):
 It was ONE person you have had a bad experience with. Just like "not all men" there is a "not all women bosses".
You might GET another boss like that, you might not. But if you don't get out there and TRY and find a good job (one where you feel comfortable and glad to be) then SHE, this bully WINS! Do you WANT her to control your life? Do you WANT her to win?
I've had a bad female boss as well, but I have had a good one too.
Don't let ONE person and ONE negative experience color your whole truth.
YOU can do this.!
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (7 July 2017): I am in a new team for a year now. In my first 3-4 months, my female manager gave me hell too. I went to HR and told them i was going to look to leave for a new team within IT. Long story short, i got the head of my area involved and he convinced me not to leave and sorted her out. Its been a year and 4 months and my manager now smiles and greets me evry morning on her way to her desk.
If you are not happy, leave the company or move to another team.
Love, all the way from South Africa.
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A
male
reader, Denizen  +, writes (7 July 2017):
 If you aren't appreciated in you place of work you really only have one option.
Sorry, but for your own sanity it's time to start digging the tunnel.
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