A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hi, I'm 15 and I've been with my boyfriend for a year and a half. He is pretty much perfect for me, he's lovely, caring, understanding, witty, funny etc etc etc. But recently things have been getting a bit monotonous, nothing is spontaneous or unique anymore, if we go to each others house we just do the same thing all the time. I think this is mainly because the relationship currently isn't heading anywhere as nothing much is really changing at all, school life is all just the same. Also it's not developing physically or mentally anymore, obviously at first it was hold hands, hug and lead on to making out etc, but now we have stopped at this point until we're ready to move on it feels like we're stuck, and obviously we know practically everything about each other and all the trust is built so it's not developing in that way either. Also we've been arguing a lot more, this is mainly my fault for a number of reasons and we always make up but this isn't exactly having a good effect on our relationship. I don't want to break up with him because there aren't many genuinely nice, honest people around nowadays and he's definitely a keeper, I just need some advice on how to bring us back to life, and also how to stop myself from causing arguments? I always know it's wrong after I've started it I just can't stop myself in the moment. Also, do you think he feels the same way about it all?
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reader, anonymous, writes (10 May 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHi Mandy, we're not sexually active and don't intend to be anytime soon, I don't think this is anything to do with our problems. And our arguments are always at school, if he beats me or gets to do something I'm not doing that's when an argument usually starts, jealousy.
A
female
reader, TasteofIndia  +, writes (10 May 2011):
 This is normal in any relationship. This is when the honeymoon period ends, and you start getting a little bored, maybe a little testy with each other. So know that what you're going through is perfectly normal! Usually it happens right around now, at a year and a half - so you're right on track.
The thing to do is to get more creative. Go on unique dates, step outside of the routine a bit! Go see some live theater, go to the zoo, go fishing. Something to liven things up! This is the time in the relationship where you have to push through the boredom and force some new stuff into your lives! So get creative, get thinkin' and make new memories together. Get out of the house! The weather is getting nicer now, so there's no reason not to take advantage of that and enjoy it!
Good luck, sweet!
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A
female
reader, Dear Mandy +, writes (10 May 2011):
 Hi
You dont say weather your both sexualy active? If your not, maybe his feeling a little scared because he knows you have been together for some time, and the next step is obvious? And you also dont explain what the arguments you think you are causing, cause this would helpme better understand where you are coming form. But it sounds like nerves to me, maybe he knows its the next step, but is scared he might not meet your expectaions when it comes to sex? your both still young, and you have a great big future a head of you, why dont you just go with the flow and see how things plan out, and maybe back off a bit if you think your the one who causes te rows.
I hope this has helped
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