A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend and I have been dating for 4 months now and I enjoy every waking moment with him. I losy my virginity to him after 3 months but he didn't know I was a virgin. It wasn't even like actual sex. We just sort of had a quicky in my friend's washroom. I'm worried he won't be happy with my body when he sees it with the lights on. I tried loosing wieght but he says he loves me either way. What can I do to boost my confidence about my body? What kind of lifestyle changes can I improve on?Please help.
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male
reader, ironman777  +, writes (17 February 2011):
Ok I'll tell you a little secret....dont ever be ashamed of your body - most men will still love sex with even someone who is massive - one of my girlfriends got very large during the time we were together and I still enjoyed sex with her - she could orgasm 5 or 6 times for every one of mine lucky girl....What was the sexiest thing about her was that she was never self concious about her figure - she just went ahead and enjoyed herself anyway - men love woman who know how to orgasm freely and also who aren't afraid to slide their soft bodies all over you while having sex and they smile....Enjoy yourself while having sex - just revel in the sensations and you won't worry about your figure. Have fun...
A
male
reader, Greasy +, writes (17 February 2011):
Call me greasy, but a bathroom makes for a great "Where'd you lose your virginity" story... Like a great wine, that'll just get better with age!
Incidentally, so will your confidence in your body. The first responder's advice on eating healthy & working out is correct when it comes to how to go about getting in shape. I'd suggest, though, that just getting in shape won't affect your self-image all that much (although the accomplishment aspect of it will certainly do alot for your self-image). When you get down to brass tacks, you can either be confident or not in whatever body you have. Myself, my body resembles the ill-begotten spawn of a potato and a pear, if both lived in a trailer park. That said, I've gotten to an age where confidence isn't that much of an issue anymore, and (I think because of that) I get the occaisional sultry glance in the supermarket - which is great! (They could be just after pears & potatoes, mind you... But I stand by my reasoning nonetheless.)
Getting back to your question - how to boost your confidence in your body. My short answer would be to "use it." Essentially, the more often you're with your BF, the more often that you both have a great time, the more confident you'll become in your body. "Hell," your subconscious will say, "I can get him off *that* much with *these* muffin tops, then Hell - there's nothing wrong w/what I've got after all!"
I'd wager, moreover, that your BF probably doesn't care one 16,000th about your body as much as your mind might lead you to beleive. He likes you to the point of ravishing you within a short distance of someplace where somebody has pooed, in unflattering light, and (odds are) with toothbrushes and novelty soaps scattering here, there, & everywhere. I bet you guys didn't even brush your teeth before hand... What that suggests to me is that he sees in you a lot more than how much meat you've got on your bones - and that's something you can take to the confidence bank.
The last thing I'll say is on the notion of improving your lifestyle, etc. That's fine if and only if you're doing it for its own sake, or for your own sense of accomplishment. If you're doing it for someone else, it will not only be more difficult but it may also lead to your resenting him at some level - which won't be good for what you have together. And like I said before, it's likely not even necessary as he probably doesn't *want* you to "improve" for his benefit in the first place (& if he does, then that's a whole other issue as to his worthiness as a BF).
Well that was long, but I hope it helped. Now go forth & accost him in the nearest bathroom you can find!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 February 2011): You lost your virginity in a bathroom. That's kind of sad. And you're worried about your body and you haven't been honest with your boyfriend. It's all really sad.
How to boost your confidence in yourself and your body? Don't do things that make you uncomfortable, like having sex in a bathroom. Don't say you're something you are not. Don't pretend to have experience you don't have. Don't pretend. It's kind of basic.
If you think you don't look good go see a doctor, go to the gym, go get a makeover.
Lifestyle changes basically don't pretend to be something you are not, eat healthy foods, workout, don't have sex in bathrooms. That's really sad sorry to say that but it is. Any girl who likes romance will feel let down by this story so why did you let this happen? If he forced it, because you lied, then stop lying and stop pretending. Be real.Be honest. Be healthy. Its not rocket science, there's no magic. Be good to yourself.
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