A
female
age
41-50,
*hibs2013
writes:My husband has a low sex drive but mine is extremely high and I'm looking for tips or advice on how to spice up our sex life and things I can do or say to get him excited and turned on.
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female
reader, Thibs2013 +, writes (29 October 2017):
Thibs2013 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionYes we are both physically active and he's in great shape and he's actually 5 years younger than me and the thing is that I think I just have a higher sex drive then he does and I was just looking for ideas for getting him thinking about it more and different ways of turning him on without seeming like I am being pushy or demanding if you know what I mean. I mean he can naturally go longer without it then I can and I know I think about it more than he does but I just don't want to feel like I'm always asking or talking about it. I am basically looking for ideas of how to get his mind thinking about it more or things I can do that aren't so pushy feeling. Thanks in advance for any ideas or tips. And by the way he's 37 and I'm 41 and we've been together 8 years and married almost 5 years. Just incase that helps any
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 October 2017): Are you both physically active and what about stress these factors can kill a mans sex drive. Or is it medical like diabetes or just to much aspirin can do it as well analysts is the key
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A
male
reader, Garbo +, writes (23 October 2017):
 I'm assuming that your husband is in your age bracket, and that is when most men u forgo huge drop in hormonals, particularly the ones with sex. Virtually every man has half the amount of DHEA at 40 than he had in 20s and that hormone controls a lot of sexual potency. Add lack of excersise (which creates testosterone) and mineral deficiency (like zinc that synthesizes it) plus stress ... and it may add up to no sex desire. Being sexually stimulated but unable to perform can be frustrating to some men, and cause friction in relationship.
There is no way to tell what your man lacks but you could get him analyzed to see what is needed. Excersise is something you both could set as new routine as well. You could search the web on which supplements do what for guys and find those that fit his profile.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 October 2017): Maybe he just has a low sex drive if he's always been this way it's just the way he is ..except or walk away .. pressure is not a turn on
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A
female
reader, Youcannotbeserious  +, writes (23 October 2017):
 Is your husband healthy? Does he have a stressful job? Is he often tired. Does he keep himself fit? Does he eat healthily: All these things can have a profound effect on sex drive.
Learn how to give each other a good massage. This will not only help to ease any aches and pains but will also tune you both in to each other's bodies and what feels good. It can also be tremendously arousing for both parties.
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A
female
reader, femmenoir  +, writes (23 October 2017):
 You can try many different things.
You can try talking a bit dirty to him prior to sex and perhaps even introduce a bit of "fantasy" talk.
My tip, think of something that truly turns you on & gets you sexually excited, then you could quietly/gently get close to him, either on the couch, or in bed & start talking to him that way.
You could even try wearing something that makes you feel really sexy, but do keep it sexy and don't go "tacky", because there is a big difference.
You could try watching some sexy, but tasteful youtube together.
Erotic Tales series comes to mind.
I haven't watched it personally, however, i do know of a few couples that really enjoy it.
You can try talking about the two of you only & look, even gaze lovingly & with attraction into each others eyes, because the eyes pretty much say it all & do try touching of hands.
This can be very sensuous and intimate.
You can try teasing him with your lips, by way of gentle kisses, whispering in his ear & by even giving him a sensual massage semi naked.
Men do love this!
You can try body kissing and a bit of oral pleasure, if he likes that and hopefully that will lead to more.
You can also prepare a romantic dinner for the two of you & dress up, yes dress up, even if at home.
Wear something feminine and sexy, wear a bit of perfume, let your hair down & wear a bit of lip gloss.
Cook something tasty & have some wine on hand.
Drinking a bit of wine together is always romantic & sexy.
You could then get a bit naughty & even wear nothing underneath & during or toward the end of the dinner, you could let him know this.
It may sound a bit tacky, but you could even play footsies with him under the table.
It's an oldie but a goodie.
You really should look inside yourself and use your own wild imagination, because i'm sure it's in there somewhere!
All the best & let me know how you get on.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (22 October 2017): tell him to get his doctor to test his testosterone levels.
If it is low, it is easy to take supplemental testosterone. That would make a huge difference.
Been there, done that...
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (22 October 2017): First a couple questions. Has he always had a low sex drive? If not he might have ED and should consider seeing a doctor to seek avenues of help.If you or he don't think that's a possibility I can make a few suggestions. Dress up in very sexy clothing and put on a little show for him, maybe striptease or give him a lap dance. Surprise him as he walks in the door wearing nothing but a pair of stiletto heels. Cook a nice meal for him wearing nothing but a pair of stiletto heals. Wear a wig and provocative clothing and pretend you're someone else. Tell him what you'd like to do to him and what you'd like him to do to you using language that will stimulate his imagination. Blindfold him and love him down from head to toe using every technique you know. Hope some of this helps. I've tried them all on my partner and he's liked every one of them.
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