A
male
age
36-40,
*ndy00
writes:Hi everyone. I've had a bit of a bad day: Today I felt chest pains as I woke up in the morning (people have informed me this is a sign of stress). Then later in college I began to feel very sharp pains when I sat up straight. I found out yesterday my tutor forgot to send off my university references before christmas, so he did it later that day, but it has really lessened my chances of getting into Uni. Today I felt like I was criticized for my singing, when my tutor was trying to make me sing in a style I wasn't used to, and he said things like "Stop making stupid noises...". I had an argument with one of my closer friends over a stupid bet, but we got through it. I have a huge project to do that needs handing in soon, so I've had a lot of work to do on that. And lastly, to top it off; On the way home I walked to the end of the road so I could cross over and get on my bus, in doing so, I had accidently walked into the path of this old guy. He had plenty of time to walk around me, but as he did so, he yelled "GET OUT OF MY WAY, YOU *****!".All this could be why I'm feeling low, but just now it feels like I've felt this way for atleast a couple of days now. My life isn't bad, but I'm just not happy at the present time.I've felt signs of stress in the past week and over the past couple of days I've felt miserable. I feel like nobody really likes me, I feel like I can't do anything right, and I feel like I'm never going to have a happy relationship like I had not so long ago. Since that relationship ended, I feel like I lost everything that made me truly happy. I had somebody who loved me, lost her, and as a result, I'm not a happy person anymore, and I WANT TO BE!!How can I be happy again? I've been told I need to love myself to feel happy. And I thought I did like myself, but now I'm not so sure. These days I just feel like a parasite. What can I do to cheer myself up? As I say, compared to lots of people I have a great life, but I just want to start enjoying it again.
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female
reader, e.grace +, writes (19 January 2009):
Hey.
Ive not been feeling myself lately. I used to be this bright young girl, who would also be the one laughing and joking and have nothing to worry about. But a year later ive gone to the complete opposite! I have a great life, i have lovely family who show me unconditional love. And being this miserable sad person makes me feel guilty because their not used to seeing me like this. I hate to admit that i may be acutely depressed? ive researched the symptom's and i seem to match nearly all of the physcological symptoms. I pray at night mainly when i wake up in the middle of it and break my heart crying. This isnt me. I dont know if its to do with "growing up" I know time will tell... But right now i need a little more reassurance. I used to always make an effort with my friends. but now im always worrying if im going to be happy when i go out, as sometimes when im not "me" my friends are always asking me. "whats up? are u ok?" because there not used to seeing me this quiet. It hurts me alot to think ive changed. I just wish i could get the old me back!
A
female
reader, just-ask-xx +, writes (11 January 2008):
 Hi, I feel your pain, I really do, lately I've been depressed and people around me don't help at all, a lot telling me that there are people in the world that are starving and dying, and when I think about that, it makes me feel worse as though I'm miserable for no reason and I try to stop it, I really do but I can't. And it sounds as though you have too. If you're feeling really down, do what I usually do, get together with a load of friends and just have a laugh, go drinking, and be silly!! I should do this but I just can't seem to find the time, but this weekend, I'm cancelling everything and I'm taking my own advice. Actually half the reason I'm miserable is because well....me and my fiancee broke up, I found out he was cheating and so I'm single again. Friends tell me the well known saying: "There's plenty more fish in the sea..." and I know that and even though I'm 19, I feel so worthless. A lot of people have been telling me that I rushed into engagement but I didn't plan to get married for a few years and I truly did love him. I felt like my world collapsed when I found out but people keep telling me "There's no point in crying over spilt milk." and yes, where I live, people know a lot of sayings =] but anyways, I try to think like that and for some reason, I can't, I really can't but I'm young and my life will get back on track, eventually.
Anyways, enough about my problems. You're about my age right? So...just take my advice, even, if it helps, pig out on choccy and anything, just make an appointment with your gym! =] No one will understand what you are feeling, nobody except you. Well some others maybe just a bit. And you're the only one who can turn your life around. Make a difference in your life, a makeover, make new friends, anything that will boost your self esteem, and hey, we'll both do it =] Deal? We both do it, and get our lives sorted out =].
xo
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A
female
reader, Sugarbuns  +, writes (10 January 2008):
 Oh Andy, I feel your plight!...One of the things we women are famous for doing when we're feeling low like this, is to have a make-over if you will. Take a good look in the mirror. Is it time for a new hair cut? A new hairstyle that will bring out the man in you?...Make your eyes more noticable, bring out your smile? It sounds vain, but pampering yourself does wonders for your self-esteem, even for men! Maybe you'd look sexy with some highlights or a lighter/darker shade of hair color. Don't be embarrassed. Lots of men do this and women sit up and take notice! Take a good look at your clothes too. Could it be time for a wardrobe overhaul? We all get stuck in fashion ruts that keep us from looking our best. It may be time for you to think about ways to improve your style. Women love a guy who knows how to dress nice (and I don't mean a suit and tie) just pulling simple pieces together can make you look chic and totally datable. This will do much to improve your self-image and give you a chance to be noticed! Now, as far as the sucky comments your tutor made to you -- take heart, all criticism stings like hell at first, but once you've licked your wounds, realize that his advice may have some validity. He's wanting to see a more mature/serious side to you, and he's given you something to work on. Step up to the plate and knock his socks off next time. And one of the things about being an adult, is not to hold grudges against people but just roll with it. This will do alot to keep you from feeling more stressed out also. Now as far as you waking up with pains and having pains during the day. Well, posture may be playing a role this. Try not to slump so much when you're in class. Take a look at your diet too, sometimes foods that give us a bit of gas, can cause pain to travel up into our ribcage and into our chest. Another thing you may be doing is sucking air. I know it sounds insane, but sometimes if you swallow air it creates a gas bubble that later burbles back into your esophogus and feels like your heart is exploding! It actually has nothing to do with your heart and is not life-threatening, but it hurts like hell and you think it's something horrible. Think about your habits. We all do things like then sometimes but if you're able to recognize it, you can be more aware of things that could be causing it. I really feel like your sadness and the feeling is creating some negative energy in your life and everything just adds up. Also, do you believe in spiritual things? It may be time to ask for God's help. Hang in there! We love you.
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