A
female
age
51-59,
*appy pina
writes:Hello all!I am a 43 year old woman who, (after 2.5) years of being single, have met a 46 year old man who is a wonderful match for me. We laugh, and have a killer intimate relationship... We've been seeing each other for about 4.5 months now, however, he keeps talking about how special I am and that we will always be great friends after I meet someone new. In the same breathe, he tells me he loves me and how wonderful he feels when we are together....I feel like he's pushing me away, yet we just started. he's a very independant man and lives alone. I've never even seen his place.I don't know how to read this man... my gut tells me he loves me but part of me tells me not to waste any more of my time. Is he afraid? Emotionally not ready? Reply to this Question
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (25 September 2013): wow!!! that dude has you fooled. he doesn't love you but he does love the fact that you are his booty call. how can you not see it?! if he gave a the least little bit about you in a love kind of way he wouldn't even entertain the thought of you being with someone else. that's crazy. open your eyes and see what's really going on here. he's not into you. youre just his booty call. thats it. whoa!
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (23 September 2013): It sounds like he only wants sex from you, nothing more. He doesn't even have enough respect for you to invite you to his home. Do you think he's treating you with such disregard and disrespect because you are allowing him to? If I were in your predicament I would regain my self-respect by disposing of him. Never allow anyone to use you for sex and nothing more. Ewh...ewh again! Elevate your standards and self-respect and I assure you you won't have to face a man just wanting sex from you and nothing more.
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A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (21 September 2013):
 My "Guy Textbook" has a chapter on just this behaviour. The title of that chapter is: "Keep her on the hook for sex.... letting her know that - even if you and she don't become or remain "an item".... then, you and she can - and WILL - remain "friends" such that she can justify putting out for you... even if - or, after - she dumps you, or you dump her."
Do you need a copy of that chapter????
Good luck...
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A
male
reader, Xearo  +, writes (21 September 2013):
You should not be intimate with someone that you do not trust. You should take the time to get to know him as much as possible: like his residence and his feelings for you. Either he is not clear of your intentions or he is not clear of yours. Chances are that he has become used to only having intimacy with you and tells you want you want to hear.
Nothing much to read here other than he is just using you for sex and vice versa.
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A
female
reader, AuntyEm  +, writes (21 September 2013):
 Where do you go when you want to be intimate?
Do you speak in the evenings and on the weekend?
Can you call him any time you like and he answers and has a normal conversation with you?
Has he introduced you to any of his family and friends?
He either has such low self esteem that he has to constantly test your loyalty by pushing you away OR he's already in another relationship...
Either way, he seems like a total flake so probably better off without him!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 September 2013): You joking, right? He tells you already that he is not going to stay with you, but how much he loves you. That's such a BS. You are going to stay great friends after you find someone new, what the hell is that supposed to mean? Did you ask him that? And you never ever saw his place, did he see yours? My opinion is that either he is married, or incredibly poor that he is ashamed to show you his place, either way it's not good.
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A
female
reader, Intrigued3000  +, writes (21 September 2013):
 You've been together 4.5 months and you haven't seen his place? Are you sure he's not married or living with someone? That's a huge red flag and could indicate why he's not willing to commit.
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