A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:This guy and I have been hooking up for about 2 years now. Im falling in love with him and he tells me that he loves me but he hasnt asked me to be his girlfriend. This leads me to believe that hes just using me for hook ups and that hes keeping his options open just in case someone better comes along. I dont want to look like a fool so ive tried ignoring him or moving on but every time he just kept coming back to me and i couldnt resist him. Is he just using me? should i give up and move on or keep waiting?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 September 2010): If all you do is "hook up" then yes he is using you. WAKE UP if he wanted you to be his gf he'd have asked you by now.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 September 2010): You need to TELL him you are moving on, and make sure he understands you guys are done. If you just hope he'll stay away, he won't. If you just hope you'll be able to stop loving him, you won't if he keeps coming around to reaffirm this false love. If you keep letting him abuse your heart...he will. This was FWB and you got attached. One person always develops deeper feelings in a FWB relationship if it lasts long enough.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (16 September 2010): He is using your feelings against you to get your body.
And you wouldn't be in this mess if you weren't trying to use your body against him to get his feelings.
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A
female
reader, xanthic +, writes (16 September 2010):
 Sorry to say it, but if he really loved you, he would want to be your boyfriend. He doesn't and never will, because it's already been two years. As things are now, he's stringing you along because it's convenient. He gets sex from you without any commitment, which gives him no reason to want more. He knows telling you the truth means he might lose you as a friend with benefits, which means no more no-strings-attached sex.
You say you can't resist him, but you can. You're the one in control of your life, so take control. Ignore his calls and texts, don't speak to him at all, ever. The only thing he's ever going to come to you for is sex, as he has for the last two years. Why continue going through that when you know you want something more, and he doesn't?
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A
female
reader, Fairy_Lu  +, writes (16 September 2010):
 Have you tried talking to him about it? Because if he doesnt want to talk about it or call you his gf when he says he loves you then yeah you are being used!
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A
female
reader, pinktopaz +, writes (16 September 2010):
Two years and he's still not your boyfriend...yes, he's using you. Yes, give up and move on. Waiting any longer will just be more waisted years of your life.
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A
female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (16 September 2010):
 I'm thinking you've posted on here before, and let me tell you no one's answers will change the second time around. We're not going to tell you what you want to hear.
2 years and you're still waiting for him to ask you out? Too long to wait. Yes, he is stringing you along and has you around just for sex only. You are friends with benefits and will never be anything more, 2 years later and you think you would learn by now. He tells you he loves you, giving you false hope so you'll stay around. You already look like a fool because you can't resist hooking up with him. As you already know the answer to the question move on, find someone who won't use you for sex.
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