A
female
age
41-50,
*verlast
writes: Hello never thought id go to a website for help......Well here it goes Ive been married for 5 years, my marriage was going great. Till my husband bought a play-station 3 he is in denial of his lack of interest in our relationship. I feel lonely now he spends hours glued to the screen it has also now affected our sex life, cheating has crossed my mind but i never attempted it. I truly love him but I'm tired of waiting for him to finish playing his games so we can have us time i wait on him for everything all to the cause of his stupid play-station. Are me and him times are once every 2 weeks when we go grocery shopping even like that his talk of his game console continues I'm greatful its not another woman he is focusing his time on, but his game addiction is coming between us.Please some one help me out
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 May 2010): He is avoiding life. Spending hours on gaming is an escape from reality which can be hugely addictive. However, reality is going on around him. Unless you make it absolutely clear what you believe is wrong, establish and agree what to do he will carry on and your relationship might as well be over. If you talk very very honestly and say that you are lonely and you are serious about what you are saying to him it is up to him as to his response and subsequent actions. Don't give him chance after chance to change. If he doesn't after this - then I guess his gaming is more important than you or his relationship. You know what you need to do.
A
female
reader, chigirl +, writes (29 May 2010):
Tell it to his face. You have an issue in your marriage, and he needs to step up to his responsibilities: he needs to be with you and FIX it! Lay it out to him: his addiction is hurting the relationship. He can continue to destroy the marriage, or he can act now and cut down on the gaming! One hour a day. Not more. AND, make designated time for the two of you to be together and have couples time.
I know how you feel. The gaming of my ex-fiancee was basically the reason we broke up. He never had time for me, always put me second to his gaming, we couldn't do things together because he had his games etc etc. I was lonely, and didn't see how much his addiction destroyed us until it was too late. I also became so used to being on my own that when he DID come to be with me, I brushed him off. Because he so rarely did, and I started to lead my life without including him.
Make it stop NOW.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 May 2010): I have the same problem! Tamper with the box to break it in some way! Or even mess with the plug (be safe whilst doing this!!!!) Take it to a professional and ask them to make it stop working! Hahaha... Or set out a written schedule of when you spend time just the two of you, and when you each get 'me time' good luck! X
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A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (29 May 2010):
Yeah, Playstations can be addicting. Your husband does have to learn balance when it comes to playing it. It's usually the way it goes when one gets a new game that there's tons of playing it and staying up until 3am for nights on end.
You two should talk and work out a compromise, but even more, you should find a hobby to fill your time with as well so that you're not depending on him for your only source of entertainment and companionship.
As for intimacy - don't cheat on him. :P Suggest spending an hour or two together before he logs on his PS3 and gets lost in the game. Ask him out to drinks like when you were dating.
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A
female
reader, MonksDaBomb +, writes (29 May 2010):
This sounds exactly like a "True Life" episode I saw on MTV not too long ago called "I'm addicted to video games." One couple saw a counselor about the one's obsession with the games.
Try talking to him and tell him how you feel lonely and want to spend more time with him and how you're jealous of a video game. Then try to compromise - say he can play for x amount of time a day and the two of you can be intimate for x amount of time a day. If that doesn't work and there is no change in his behavior, perhaps seeing a counselor and talking it out is the way to go.
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