A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:What do you do when your long term boyfriend breaks it off, (for stupid reasons of course) and doesn't want to talk to you, based on something his "friends" said. When in reality they aren't his friends, and want to have a threesome with you. Very twisted situation. Advice...
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female
reader, igby  +, writes (21 July 2007):
 In a perfect world we should as indivduals be free to make decisions over who we date, but friends play a vital role in shaping our opinions on dating, romantic and our choice of partners.
He is presently being a typical young male and getting defensive. Ask to see him, so you can talk, and if won't do that write him a letter. Try and explain yourself, whatever the situation is, and say that if you trust each other you can talk through almost anything. This is as much for you as it is for him. If he doesn't want to talk to through than he isn't mature enough to be with you. If he takes his friends word as truth on this matter then it will just keep happening.
(I had a similar situation, my guy eventually woke up and saw that his friends were posioning his mind).
But if he can't see it then there is nothing you can do but move on, hopefully to someone that respects you enough to hear your side. Communication is key!
Hope it works out.
A
female
reader, mary-lee +, writes (21 July 2007):
 it's pretty hard to get his attention when he doesn't want to talk to you. and this lie the friends told him must be a doozy if he just broke it off like that. so if he wont talk to you, try talking to his friends and ask them why they did it. if you really want to get back with him, be persistant. he should have spoken to you about it before he broke up with you, but he is probably just trying to protect himself from heartbreak.
so i'm saying, hang in there if you want to make it work. be persistant, show him you really want to talk bout it!
good luck!
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A
male
reader, DV1 +, writes (21 July 2007):
 Move on. That's all you can do. I know that it may be hard, but if he was able to break up with you that quickly, then he never cared about you in the first place. I listen to the concerns of my friends over the girls I date, but I always make the final decision after weighing everything. It sounds like they thought that they would have a chance if they ruined everything. I would keep them all out of your life, and move on to better things. They'll see that you're still doing well after they messed things up, and they'll see how wrong their actions were...
DV1
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A
male
reader, Peterk5699  +, writes (21 July 2007):
 That's a tough one to answer but I'll try and help.
You should sit down one-2-one and ask him if he's doing the same as his friends. None of us here know him, only you know him best. You know when he's telling the truth and vice versa.
So if he does the thing he does when telling the truth, tada! he's telling the truth and vice-versa.
Hope this helps
Pete
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