A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:ok well me and my boyfriend have been dating for a year and half now and have been living together for eight months. Recently his sister who is a lesbian lost her job and her and her girlfriend needed somewhere to stay. I'd never met the girlfriend so i was kind of weary at first but i've always liked his sister and i figured she was desperate so i agreed to let them stay with us. They've been staying with us for about eight or nine weeks now and i cant stand it! The girlfriend is totally disrespectful to my house,my boyfriend and even my own parents when they visited! For instance we were all sitting down for dinner (my boyfriend,me,my parents,his sister and her) and she burped! And i mean a belch and didnt even say excuse me! I was livid and then when i went to confront her about it, she said it never happened and slammed the door in my face! In the house that i paid for! For the past week or so me and my boyfriend have been getting into major fights about whether or not we let them stay. I said that his sister can stay either way but for her girlfriend to stay she has to talk to her about it and make her stop. He doesn't want to anger either or them and thinks this should be dealt with between us three but i cant deal with it! I need him there to back me up but everytime he tries to say something they tell him to mind his own business so he finally gave in! This stupid bitch is screwing up my relationship now, advice?
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female
reader, Firefighter's Wife 09 +, writes (3 February 2009):
My husbands brother came back from Afghanistan and needed somewhere to stay. So me being the loving person I am I told my husband he could stay with us a couple weeks til he found somewhere. We were not yet married and had only been together for 9 months when the brother came home. I was so excited to be able to repay what he had done for us over seas. It was awesome! At first!!! The exact same thing happened! Rude ass, messy as hell, my husband(boyfriend at the time) wouldn't back me up when it came to most things! He,the brother, would come in late, drunk, and loud! Oh it was horrible! It started to tear us apart! The last week he was in town he stayed with other friends but! He was here for over 3 months! He bought a house but got one he had to fix, not one he could move into right away!
You need to get them out ASAP! Its not going to do anything but hurt you and your boyfriend. He won't want to do anything because its his sister and you don't want to hurt him. If they are disrespectful and hurting you, you need to get them out. Give them a little time to find something but after that they need to go. Its not fair to any of you to have that kind of stress around all the time.
Or you can give them an ultimatum. Tell them they have rules and need to respect them or you can't help them anymore.
Don't mean to bore you with my story but I know how stressful it is. If you need anything, I'm here! Good luck and stick to your guns!
A
female
reader, cady  +, writes (3 February 2009):
 Its time to stop being polite. Deal with this directly. Talk to his sister or talk to the girlfriend, confront them and tell them that if they dont get their act straight then you will find it difficult to accommodate them in the same house. Your boyfriend understands the problem as he tried to talk to them about it. He had only lost his patience. He is bound to support you and in any case it will be better if you deal with them directly yourself. If you keep giving in to their whims and fancies the situation will only get worse than it is right now.
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A
male
reader, ArmyMedic  +, writes (3 February 2009):
 Wow, your boyfriend needs to man up and support you. It sounds like you have the right idea by wanting to evict the girlfriend. I really think it might be worth getting legal advise if your other half won't back you up. Also have you tried talking just to his sister about the issue, she may understand more than you realise.
Good luck
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